this post was submitted on 24 Dec 2023
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 14 points 7 months ago (2 children)

JESUS DIDN'T SAY THAT I HOPE YOU GET CANCER

[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 8 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Jesus didn't say anything, he never existed.

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 7 months ago (3 children)
[–] overcast5348@lemmy.world 4 points 7 months ago

Your mom never existed.

[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago

Most days I would agree but I am definitely biased on the matter.

[–] jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works 2 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

Did you just go full Facebook?? You never go full Facebook!

[–] AgentGrimstone@lemmy.world 13 points 7 months ago (1 children)

This image is fake. Can't believe I'm the only one that can tell.

[–] lugal@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago (2 children)

I also saw it. Jesus wasn't white

[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago

I am going to laugh my ass off if we ever find some letter talking about some albino Jewish magician street preacher getting crucified by Pilot.

[–] neurogenesis@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Nobody in the Bible was white 😅

[–] lugal@lemmy.world 1 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Paul is from Asia Minor so he arguably was Greek and therefore white. And obviously some of the bad guys like the Romans.

[–] neurogenesis@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 7 months ago (1 children)

The term only began to be used in the 1600s (for .. reasons), but it seems Paul was born in what is now Turkey

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[–] mriormro@lemmy.world 12 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)
[–] Rolando@lemmy.world 12 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

I want to know how all the people in that picture deal with parking. They must have huge parking structures.

[–] AnonWyo@startrek.website 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

They have cars in the Middle East?

Oh. Wait. Just the Israelis.

[–] Annoyed_Crabby@monyet.cc 2 points 7 months ago

Bullshit, ISIS have toyota hilux.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 10 points 7 months ago

After viewing that, I think Jesus needs to heal my glaucoma or something...

[–] TokenBoomer@lemmy.world 8 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

This is not a meme, and OP is always posting lies about the Holy Ghost 👻 . Everyone knows Jebus was a good Sumerian.

Edit: Downvote me all you want. It just proves my point.

[–] AnonWyo@startrek.website 1 points 7 months ago

Holy Ghost?

What the hell is this? An episode of Scooby-Doo?

"And I would've gotten away with it if it wasn't for you God and Jesus kids!"

[–] HiddenLayer5@lemmy.ml 8 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

So the people followed his advice, got offended at his memes, and crucified him. /s

He's not the memelord! He's a very naughty boy!

[–] TheRealLinga@sh.itjust.works 8 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

I'm loving the argumentative comments here! Christmas spirit at its finest chefs kiss

[–] Slovene@feddit.nl 14 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

Fuck you and have a very merry christmas with your loved ones, you asshole! And a happy new year, cunt!

[–] doctorcrimson@lemmy.world 4 points 7 months ago

Why should I give a damn what your religious figure says? This meme is stupid and you should feel bad. /s

[–] Arsaille@lemmy.world 4 points 7 months ago

Why the hell should I listen to that? This is just stupid.

[–] smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 4 points 7 months ago (1 children)

IT'S A METAPHOR, NOT TO BE TAKEN LITERALLY

[–] AnonWyo@startrek.website 5 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)

Blessed are the cheesemakers?

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

What's so special about cheesemakers?

[–] charonn0@startrek.website 3 points 7 months ago

Well, obviously it's not meant to be taken literally; it refers to any manufacturers of dairy products.

Pipe down, big-nose!

[–] m0darn@lemmy.ca 3 points 7 months ago (12 children)

I'm not a biblical scholar, like at all, but isn't that exactly the sort of thing he'd say/ do?

[–] kromem@lemmy.world 5 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)

Extra-canonically he was certainly talking a lot about dank images:

Jesus said, "When you see your likeness, you are happy. But when you see your images that came into being before you and that neither die nor become visible, how much you will have to bear!"

  • Gospel of Thomas saying 84

[...] Jesus said to them, "When you make the two into one, [...] an image in place of an image, then you will enter [the kingdom]."

  • Gospel of Thomas saying 22

(This was more relating to Plato's concept of eikon and what was effectively a version of the simulation hypothesis in antiquity, but if we throw out the context it could potentially be talking about making memes.)

[–] Blue_Morpho@lemmy.world 4 points 7 months ago (1 children)

potentially?

It was definitely about memes. It's why the Gospel of Thomas is heresy.

[–] TokenBoomer@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago

The Tank? That was a canon event.

[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

See I like your work. I don't get why you buy into Bible Literalism. Go ahead and publish already something already on the Gospel of Thomas. I will buy it if you do.

[–] kromem@lemmy.world 3 points 7 months ago (3 children)

I don't get why you buy into Bible Literalism.

I don't, and I'm not sure where you get the sense that I do.

There's a very wide gulf between thinking that a historical person named Jesus existed and that the New Testament depiction of that person is accurate.

There's a ton of things in there that are pretty clearly BS, but the way in which they are BS seems much more like an attempt to spin historical events than to invent them from scratch.

For example, Peter's denials.

Dude is nicknamed after a "hollow rock" which is actually a terrible thing to try to use as a foundation, but it's an incredible nickname for someone regularly missing the point and arguing with you.

Then around the time Jesus is being tried approximately three times Cephas is also denying Jesus three times, even seen going back into a guarded area where a trial is taking place to do so.

But it's all okay because a rooster crowed?

That sounds a lot more like there had been earlier eyewitness testimony or rumors about "hollow rock" having had a more prominent role in testifying against a historical figure which needed to be spun to be a lesser offense which was explained away as acceptable than it sounds like a fabrication originated by a religious organization owing itself to "hollow rock."

There's many places where the earliest layers of the NT are sort of engaged with a phantom tradition we can no longer see directly, and only in reflection of its opposition. Things like Mark pointing out that the women saw the empty tomb but didn't tell anyone or that Thomas doubted the resurrection but then changed his mind. Given Paul was combating the disbelief in physical resurrection in Corinth in 1 Cor 15 among what was a community following some version of Jesus, maybe traditions later on that owed themselves to female teachers, prominently had females receiving sayings from Jesus separate from the other disciples, and had an over-realized eschatology such that it rejected physical resurrection like the proto-Thomasine group were a bigger deal earlier on than the church would like to let on?

My point is that this kind of undermining and spin - "yes Cephas denied him but it was prophesied" or "no, the women actually saw the empty tomb they just didn't tell anyone, we pinky swear" - is the kind of thing we should expect from a very early split around a cultush origin and not something like Mithraism where a mythologized narrative is adapted and embellished from purely fictional origins.

As for publishing - I'd like to and plan to one day probably at least do a video series on the topic. But this is a hobby and people take religion very seriously to an irrational degree so I'm probably not going to be comfortable linking my real world self to a counter-cannonical Christian public stance until I'm retired. On the upside that gives me many more years to continue to find out more nuances.

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[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

He is a fictional. The question is if the writer needs him to do it or not.

[–] kromem@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago (18 children)

He was almost certainly not fictional.

Fictional constructs don't end up having bitterly opposed factions splintering off within decades of their supposed death, but that's an extremely common feature of nearly every cult organized around a historical central figure.

The specific depiction of Jesus canonized likely has many fictional elements, but the idea that there was no historical figure in the first place is pretty ludicrous.

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[–] joeyv120@ttrpg.network 2 points 7 months ago

He never said that stupid.

[–] pachrist@lemmy.world 2 points 7 months ago

HELLO RONNIE ITS YOUR MEEMAW EVELYN. I DONT UNDERSTAND FACEBOOK COMPUTERS OR WHY YOU LIKE BOYS THAT WAY BUT I LOVE YOU AND JESUS LOVES YOU PLEASE DONT GET ANY MORE TATOOS

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