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the "anti-sex' bed (i.imgur.com)
submitted 2 weeks ago by TehBamski@lemmy.world to c/microblogmemes@lemmy.world
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[-] CoffeeJunkie@lemmy.cafe 85 points 2 weeks ago

Like...I get it...but at the same time, they're young, taut, and hot. Just let these beautifully sculpted human beings have sex with each other? Let them enjoy this one life that we have? Give them some birth control & leave them be. What fucking jealous, irrational prudes. 🙄

I hope they have all kinds of crazy sex, just because they can.

[-] ricecake@sh.itjust.works 66 points 2 weeks ago

Fortunately, they're not actually small for that purpose. They're just small beds made of recycled material.

The Olympic committee isn't that naive. They're distributing literally hundreds of thousands of condoms and related safe sex accessories.

[-] bionicjoey@lemmy.ca 33 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

The Olympic committee isn't that naive. They're distributing literally hundreds of thousands of condoms and related safe sex accessories.

It's up to the host country how to handle the horniness of the Olympic village, not the committee. Some countries in the past have taken measures to discourage it.

FWIW, the Olympic village has been an STD hotbed in the past. But distributing protection is way more likely to help with that than trying to keep the athletes off of each other.

[-] ricecake@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 weeks ago

Fair enough, I conflated the Olympic committee with the Olympic organizers. :)

In any case, someone is realistic about these things because they're taking some steps to try to keep things clean while they get dirty.

[-] cm0002@lemmy.world 21 points 2 weeks ago

I wish I was hot enough to be fucked by an Olympic athlete. I'd probably die just trying to think about keeping up with their endurance, but what a way to go out!

[-] todd_bonzalez@lemm.ee 21 points 2 weeks ago

Look, I'm a kinda fat 30 something dude, and I just do kegels and edge and I can fuck for like 45 minutes solid. Athletes waste all their time exercising non-erogenous parts of their body. If gooning was an Olympic sport, I'd take the gold.

Tl;Dr: Don't have sex with an Olympian, have sex with me.

[-] GBU_28@lemm.ee 19 points 2 weeks ago

Please expand this to about 1000 words and you got a new copypasta goin

[-] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

haha hiiiii

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[-] umbrella@lemmy.ml 5 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

i feel its just bitter ugly old people in charge of this stuff

[-] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

Also film it plz.

[-] salvaria@lemmy.blahaj.zone 49 points 2 weeks ago

They're not anti-sex beds

[-] MossyFeathers@pawb.social 32 points 2 weeks ago

It was kinda obvious tbh. French and anti-sex are not two things that I'd normally put together.

[-] bionicjoey@lemmy.ca 15 points 2 weeks ago

Plus they've already loaded up on Olympic brand condoms

[-] ricecake@sh.itjust.works 17 points 2 weeks ago

Man, if they could get sign off to use the Olympics logo, it would more than make up for donating almost any number of condoms just in advertising options.

Side by side shots of different pairs of pole vaulters flopping onto their landing mats. Scenes of different sports, starting with slow ones and cuts to different ones. Slowly, it starts to jump to faster sports, where the athletes are making more vocalizations, by the end it's just a focus on curlers furiously brooming while they all do their excited yells of joy and then a moment of silence while we zoom in on some shotput throwers faces just as they're throwing, and then cut to a rapid series of divers splashing into the water, audio overlay of a soccer commentator screaming "goal", and then a pan across the cheering crowd. "Trojex: for when the world comes together", with five overlapping condoms in the background, fading to the Olympic logo.

[-] slaacaa@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

“I just came. Bring the spare pants into my office, Christina!”

-some marketing executive somewhere (probably)

[-] shalafi@lemmy.world 16 points 2 weeks ago

Thanks! I was trying to work out how the hell it was supposed to work. Because it sure wouldn't stop me.

[-] Gerudo@lemm.ee 39 points 2 weeks ago

Nobody has ever had sex outside of a bed.

[-] pyre@lemmy.world 38 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

unmatched even years later... what a wonderful format. i love reading things backwards.

[-] Kiosade@lemmy.ca 12 points 2 weeks ago

It’s the stupidest thing, and i cant wait for people to stop using that shitty website

[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 34 points 2 weeks ago

Anyone who thinks a twin bed isn't big enough to have sex on, has never been horny enough to break a twin size bed fucking on it.

[-] HappycamperNZ@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago

"sorry, we can't have sex because the bed is too small" said no one ever.

Id fuck on a fucking face cloth on the floor.... which might actually make cleanup easier too.

[-] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 28 points 2 weeks ago

It's the same stupid propaganda that comes out every Olympics. It never happened. There's just no reason for a king size bed for everyone.

[-] StellarExtract@lemm.ee 4 points 2 weeks ago

I can think of a few reasons...

[-] thesporkeffect@lemmy.world 25 points 2 weeks ago

Im sure the world's most athletic and flexible young adults will be unable to ' do the deed ' on this m - hey stop that!

[-] hdnsmbt@lemmy.world 24 points 2 weeks ago

Can anybody explain what the thinking behind censoring the word "sex" is? I mean, who is it being censored for and what is the fear would happen if those people saw the uncensored word?

[-] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.de 29 points 2 weeks ago

YouTube's and TikTok's algorithms that determine monetization and visibility. People then censor these words on other platforms out of habit, I guess.

In spoken language, substitutions (~~porn~~ corn, ~~kill~~ unalive etc.) are more popular than bleeps.

[-] hdnsmbt@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

Ok, so what's YouTube's and tiktok's thinking, then?

[-] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.de 16 points 2 weeks ago

That negative or morally questionable topics are advertiser-unfriendly. Of course, advertisers don't need to run positive or moral ads, though.

[-] hdnsmbt@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago

I know you don't think that, but imagine thinking sex was negative or morally questionable. It all comes down to money, of course. "Can't have my brand associated with sex because some people hate sex and they might not give me their money! Better pretend like we can deny sex exists altogether." And then the same advertisers advertise beer using boobs.

[-] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.de 4 points 2 weeks ago

imagine thinking sex was negative or morally questionable

I think lots of Christian denominations find it a necessary evil. I did too before I became an atheist. Still, I think the platforms are so afraid of showing age-inappropriate content to someone they'd rather stash it away to somewhere nobody finds it unless explicitly searching for it.

[-] Ajen@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 week ago

Of course, advertisers don't need to run positive or moral ads, though.

Of course not, they're the customers so they're always right. And the "product" is tightly regulated.

[-] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

Wait, so you mean pop corn is actually...

[-] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.de 5 points 2 weeks ago

Cop porn. Pretty common roleplay actually

[-] CorvidCawder@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 weeks ago

All Cops Are Bisexual?

[-] Got_Bent@lemmy.world 19 points 2 weeks ago

Asserting that people can't have sex in a twin bed is to believe that college students are entirely celibate.

[-] AVincentInSpace@pawb.social 21 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

This is a special bed that's designed to break under the weight of more than one occupant.

Try not to think too hard about the differences in weight between the different Olympic athletes who are going to be sleeping in them. Or the implications of telling people they can't have sex because you personally would find it disgusting.

EDIT: scratch that, they're not anti sex beds: https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/anti-sex-bed-2024-olympics/

[-] Got_Bent@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

I also would never think of simply putting the mattress on the floor to save breaking the frame. That would most certainly be against the rules.

[-] T156@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago

This is a special bed that’s designed to break under the weight of more than one occupant.

That just sounds like a recipe for it to crumple if multiple people sit on it, or someone jumps into it, rather than gracefully climbing in.

[-] caboose2006@lemmy.ca 15 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah, something tells me horny 20 somethings in prime physical condition are gonna find ways to fuck.

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[-] yokonzo@lemmy.world 15 points 2 weeks ago

false

[-] Mango@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

WTF is an anti sex bed and why do I need the bed?

[-] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

So your partner can rest safely from having to tell you they have a headache tonight.

[-] Mango@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

No no no, I mean why do I gotta have a bed to have sex?

[-] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

To give your partner something to clean up afterward?

Just kidding. That’s borderline misogynistic. It’s so you can easily roll over and fall asleep after the intense 30-second marathon you just “ran”.

[-] Mango@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

Oh no, a marathon is to be had. I enjoy some toys sir.

[-] pewgar_seemsimandroid@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 weeks ago

has it been done for UEFA euro 2024?

[-] intensely_human@lemm.ee 1 points 2 weeks ago

Is that true though, the anti-sex beds? If so why aren't people outraged at the indignity of it?

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this post was submitted on 14 Jun 2024
269 points (94.7% liked)

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