More consequences than if it had raped some kids.
this post was submitted on 12 Apr 2025
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To be fair if you make an AI and ask it to be an authentic catholic priest you'd essentially have to reward it for such actions because it understood the assignment. Now why you'd make such an abomination in the first place that I don't know. The ways of the lord and all that...
Turns out "the ways of the lord" = capitalism. That's probably why he condemned his socialist son to torture and crucifixion; for the crime of empathy! God was like "Helping the poor? Absolutely fucking not!".
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I have been in IT for 20 years, have both a BS and MS in Information Technology, and I will never understand why EVERYONE has such a hard-on for AI; especially given its track record of “hallucinations”.
Aren't a lot of religions based on hallucinations that specific people have had?
Much of the craze is almost religious. You have for example Singularitarianism. Basically "Man creates AI, which will create artificial general intelligence, which will create artificial super intelligence, which will bring us the singularity, release us from drudgery and give us eternal life."
You have been in IT for 20 years and don’t understand this? Has your career not made it abundantly clear that the average person is completely computer illiterate and has no idea what AI even is? How many people have you had to assist in 20 years who insist that they have tried every possible solution, only to find out that something isn’t even plugged in or turned on?
And that high level management drives decisions about what technologies to adopt, when they know nothing about it.
Some sales guy on the golf course told them about it.
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Well obviously that's wrong, everyone who took catholic theology studies in college knows it should either be monster or white claw /j
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I mean, I'm not a theologist or anything, but based on other precedents, if someone was dying and wanted to be baptized at the last second, and no source of water could be arranged on time, the Gatorade baptism would probably be accepted by the Catholic church.
Transubstantiation of Gatorade into Holy Water doesn't even sound that outrageous when priests claim to transubstantiate wine to blood on a daily basis.
This seems to mean that priests can theoretically make any liquid holy, thereby making holy Gatorade.
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Bartender: "Sorry, dude, you've had quite a few drinks, I have to cut you off, only water for you from now on."
Jesus: "Dammit... "
I legit thought it was going to say it found some way to molest a kid
That usually results in promotion
Somehow, I imagine it similar to this
“It’s what plants crave.”
That image makes me think he's going to get mad at me for pursuing a culture victory.
I'm getting molesty vibes. I guarantee this will be the first AI who commits statutory rape
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It's got what babies crave.
I mean, water has to be blessed by a priest first before it becomes holy. So, what if the only thing available is a bottle of Gatorade but you have a priest? Couldn't he bless the Gatorade so that the person could be baptized?
Semen is like 85% water
This is an interesting question. You can use saliva to baptize in the event of an emergency (lick your thumb and make the sign of the cross on the forehead, in the name of Father, Son, Holy Spirit—but that would likely need a secondary “proper” baptism if the emergency passes, this one counting as “conditional”). Which I guess would supersede ever needing Gatorade since you always have saliva.
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Better move him to a new Parish before they figure what type of AI pornography he's into.
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Idiocracy 2, where the dumbest priest ever is sent into the future to save Catholicism.
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As an actual, honest-to-God (Episcopal) priest myself, the idea of an “AI priest” is very troubling.
The church will make an AI priest before making a woman a "priest"
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it's what believers crave! it's got electrolytes!
It has what heathens crave.
Holy shit! This appears to be real and as funny as it seems.
Bot started offering absolution and such.
Yeah they don't put him in the uniform anymore lol
its not?
wow they weren't kidding about civ7
How many kids did he rape? That seems to be the problem with the priests.
Who cares about their goofy ass rituals as long as he doesn’t rape kids.
Priests rape kids at an astonishing rate.
The Catholic Church is a gigantic pederast ring.
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That isn't why it was demoted. It was demoted because it kept insisting it was a real priest and could do real priest things like hear confessions, etc. My wife was quite holier than though about it.
Tell an LLM it's a priest then act shocked when it does priest things. Next level. Truly incredible.
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So they're saying that God doesn't have the power to make the thurstquenchanator holy?
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Sippin on the haterade as usual.
Sam and Dean using Holy Church flavoured Gatorade to defeat evil, then drinking the rest to recover their lost electrolytes...
For those who don't know, "AI-powered priest" in this case means a 3d model run by AI, not even a real person. The pronoun here is "it" not "he".
I think Father Justin can decide his pronouns on his own, don't you?
I'm sure he qualified that this would only be the case in a desperate situation where only Gatorade was available.
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