Dude met Pip and Lafawnduh irl.
this post was submitted on 20 Feb 2025
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This is the type of person to say things like "Why can other men pick up females and I can't?" It's so over the top I think it's satire.
Think you're underestimating chan life
He's not on 4chan.
Ding ding
Dating, he's dating while anon is crying and smoking
IDK, did they ever think maybe the dude also pays attention to her hobbies as well?
Answer: staying off of 4chan.
When someone genuinely likes you they will listen to you talk for hours about anything just because they like hearing you be passionate about something.
Everyone thinks rules 1 and 2 are:
- Be attractive
- Dont be unattractive
But really they are:
- Be a nice person
- Dont be an asshole
also it's probably more important to not be too unattractive - people are focusing too much on the ceiling but they need to focus on the floor
Nah. You can't do much about how you look, beyond basic hygene and self care.
You can easily do something about being interested in other people's lives, and being happy for them being happy and commiserating with them when they're sad. The bonus with this focus is it also makes you feel better about yourself in the long run.
You can’t do much about how you look, beyond basic hygene and self care.
That was exactly how I read their comment. Don't worry about trying to reach the ceiling, focus on staying off the floor. Basic hygiene, grooming, caring about yourself.
I think there is so much you can do for how you look - skin care, hydration, diet, exercise, etc. can radically change the way a person looks - but I tend to agree that personality matters much more. My point is that most people seem to get lost trying to make themselves physically attractive, and incel culture like looksmaxxing seem to fall into that logic as well, but they miss that the bar is lower than they expect. And of course, your point is missed by this community as well - that looks are even less important overall than how you hold yourself and interact, etc. - the mental stuff is the most important. Luckily good diet, hydration, and exercise help with that too!
Good points. Agree completely.
I think that they just need to look like they didn't just pick themselves off the floor, realistically.
Being emotionally balanced and secure about something at all in your life goes a long way to building a character that other people want to be around.
If these terms are meaningless to you and you don't get it, you're not ready for dating.
You know I am honestly not so sure. I have seen people who definitely aren't healthy, and probably not emotionally secure who get and sometimes keep relationships. It's a lot more complex than you think. Some part of this is because obviously people with similar issues want to be together, but I think as well that things like physical attractiveness do have a role. It's also the case that being a nice person and being emotionally stable aren't actually the same thing, and often don't go together. In fact to me it seems like people who have issues are actually less judgemental. Some of the worst people are those who have never struggled with anything.
It's like how people have this concept that they either are or aren't worthy of love. I don't think that's even a valid idea to begin with as there is no universal standard for what people want in a partner. Someone either wants you or they don't, worthiness just isn't a large factor.
You're looking at unbalanced relationships. As you say, there are plenty and some even keep going somehow. But they are not really what anyone should aim for, right? We can recognise we are not perfect and still aim high and try to improve. And of course we should probably be supporting our similarly imperfect partner do the same. Teamwork and all that.
The whole worthiness bullshit is self inflicted pain. I had a good friend exactly in that situation, thinking she didn't deserve love because she had cheated in her previous relationship. Took her a few years and the support and love of her friends before she realised that's not how things work at all. Ended up married with a gamer and a kid and opening a boardgames café together.
But do not confuse being a nice person with being a 'nice guy'.
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I dated a woman much taller than me, and received an unnatural amount of glances at my crotch when we were out in public together.
People are so ridiculous.
I'm tall and a woman. It makes me happy and feel kinda powerful that I could cause this situation and maybe even have since I've dated shorter guys and am oblivious to social stuff.
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what is he doing that I'm not?
Having self confidence about his passions and being willing to talk about them with someone who might get it the first time. Believe it or not a lot of women like to listen to guys gush about their passions.
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