I saw an angel take a shit, then eat said shit.
God works in mysterious ways.
This reminds me of the story about some old dude's dog that always shits on my neighbor's sidewalk. One day neighbor saw that and run to that guy with scary look on his face. He started scolding old guy that he should clean after his dog and old guy respond he's too old to do that, his back hurt and stuff. The dog saw the whole thing and in a shame he just ate his own shit so poor old man didn't have to clean it up.
Kudos to the dog.
If you're unable to care for a pet, you need to find it a new home.
my angel went one level derper.
he took a shit, ate it, puked up that eaten shit, then started eating that shitty puke... which he puked.
had to throw out that sofa.
One of mine brought in a frozen turd one winter and started chewing on it.
Angel poop probably taste pretty good tbf
You're free to try it
Angels attacked a friend of mine for more than 90 minutes, taking off and eating part of her legs, arms, breast and face. The paramedics that eventually brought her to the hospital were so traumatized they still have not returned to work. My friend has had 11 reconstructive surgeries so far.
#touchedbyanangel
God gives his sweetest humans to his hungriest angels.
He works in such mysterious ways. But I Trust in his greater (meal) plan
What do you expect of a homicidal god with double standards?
Demons were angels once...
Did that happen to be a pit bull angel?
These were 4 german shepherd angels
Have no fear, my child
B E N O T A F R A I D
Imagine a pitbull goring a toddler before looking you dead in the eyes and saying "BE NOT AFRAID"
I saw an angel casually walk down a street with a human head in his mouth. I'd post the video but, y'know, rule 4.
Where the fuck did you have to see that?
Mexican news. It happened in Zacatecas last year.
What are you guys on about? Lucifer was an angel.
A hot, sexy angel, as the TV keeps telling me.
But let's be honest, God has killed way more people than Satan. Dude brags about it too, with his rainbows meaning
"Haha, I promise not to hit you anymore... but I could."
I can't even think of anyone Satan killed; but God's killed the whole world at least once and only promised not to do it again in the same way.
Which is funny because how would you even defy an omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent being?
Though the old testament did write them more as old friends that disagreed on some things rather than bitter enemies, having bets and fucking with humans for their amusement. Kinda like the whole thing was made up by a bunch of different people at different times who didn't all have a strong grasp on what real power was and thought it required anger like a human with power that only exists because of threats of violence and were really just trying to turn their wise reputation into their own power backed by a vengeful god's power.
God with a thick rock hard dick under them robes, just throbbing at the thought of sending dogs to eat babies
👶🐕 ✝️🍆💦
According to the lore, demons are fallen angels so you can keep this narrative going
~~pit bulls~~ angels when they see a child
BE NOT AFRAID
OR DO BE AFRAID
IT IMPROVES THE FLAVOR
My angels are really fucking stupid. And one of them killed and ate (half of) a mole yesterday.
That mole was coming right for you! That angel saved your life!
Angels in the Bible: "Be not afraid"
Angels in Ultrakill: "I WILL WRITE A BIBLE STORY IN YOUR BLOOD, MACHINE!"
Angels in Evangelion: 🔹
The latter can fortunately be defeated with the strongest weapon known to man (and machine):
Pocket change
An angel pooped on my yard
This tracks. The God of the Bible sent an angel to kill the first born child of every household in Egypt unless they splattered lamb’s blood over their door. (Hence the Passover)
Why God have bonar
Hey, angels get hungry for that succulent childflesh just like anyone else.
An angel ran out in front of my truck the other day…
Be not afraid, I just got a craving for some literal baby back ribs.
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
