this post was submitted on 27 Feb 2024
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[–] HikingVet@lemmy.ca 90 points 4 months ago (4 children)

A least I don't drink thin bean soup.

[–] IrateAnteater@sh.itjust.works 41 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Don't bring soup into this. This is an argument between soggy leaf juice and burnt bean juice.

[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 13 points 4 months ago

Roasted bean juice, thank you very much. It's only burnt if it's from starbucks

[–] Rolder@reddthat.com 24 points 4 months ago

I prefer the term dirty bean water

[–] fidodo@lemmy.world 10 points 4 months ago
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[–] youCanCallMeDragon@lemmy.world 73 points 4 months ago (1 children)
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[–] Vespair@lemm.ee 56 points 4 months ago (8 children)

Coffee literally tastes like burnt asshole.

I'm okay with people not liking tea, but the audacity of a goddamn coffee drinker to imply that tea taste worse than their brown bean shit-water is ludicrous

[–] flying_sheep@lemmy.ml 21 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

Coffee that tastes like burnt cellulose (not as you imply cellulite lol) has been left on the warming plate too long. It's like complaining that tea tastes metallic and bitter: sure, it does if you do it completely wrong.

If you want to make good coffee, you need to use beans that haven't been roasted too dark, then make it with the right parameters for good extraction, then put into a cup immediately and drink. Just like you shouldn't warm up tea for hours before drinking it.

Great coffee can be drunk without milk and gone cold and it will still taste like some kind of strange and intense and delicious cherry tea.

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[–] june@lemmy.world 19 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Enough cream and sugar and they both taste the same. That’s my strategy.

[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 12 points 4 months ago (3 children)

You might as well be drinking coca cola if you're going that way.

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[–] BestBouclettes@jlai.lu 9 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

To be fair I think it's easier to make bad coffee than bad tea. But a proper good coffee is god tier, not sure about tea, I don't think I've ever had a proper good tea. (I am open to recommendations)

[–] Vespair@lemm.ee 13 points 4 months ago (3 children)

(I am open to recommendations)

Imo, recommending a good tea to a stranger is kind of like recommending a good song to a stranger. Without knowing more, it's just a shot in the dark. Maybe I'll recommend the greatest rap song of all time but you're strictly a country guy, you know what I mean? And I'm just an enthusiastic tea enjoyer, nothing close to an expert. But sure, I'll do my best.

First and foremost, if you have a tea shop in your area or a grocery store with a really robust loose tea section, ignore everything else I'm about to say after this paragraph and just go ask to smell some teas. Trust your nose and buy small quantities of 3 or 4 that smell appealing or like they might taste nice to you. Although I would recommend trying to steer clear of falling for sweet or "novelty" smells at this stage such as anything that smells super fruity. These might be great teas, but personally I'd start trying to form more concrete opinions on kind of "baseline teas" before muddying up the experience too much, although don't be afraid of herbal teas or ones with singular and more subtle accent flavors. If the loose tea containers don't have tea preparation instructions on them, ask a staff member. I'll mention a bit more about prep at the end here.

If you don't have that kind of access or just want to walk in and buy a box of tea bags, here are some basic beginner-friendly recommendations:

Lady Grey - You've probably at least heard of earl grey, but in my opinion it can be a little intimidating to start and bit fussier to prepare than some other varieties, but lady grey is a delightful more gentle take on the classic.

Bigelow Constant Comment - Look, this tea isn't going to blow your socks off, but it's not meant to. But what it is is a very solid, middle-of-the-road, classic baseline tea that's easy to prepare well and hard to mess up. A very solid standard choice.

Orange & Cinnamon - Any brand, doesn't have to be Twinings, they're just consistent and regularly available. Getting a bit more into the fruit and spice flavor here, but this is always excellent and taste like autumn memories.

Jamine Pearls - Doesn't matter the brand here at all. You'll probably be able to find them in pyramid tea bags, but these don't actually require tea bags. These are an excellent starter green tea as they tend to be mild, and watching the pearls unravel is a famously pleasant tea-drinker experience. Not everyone's vibe, but definitely worth trying.

Mighty Leaf African Nectar - This one is a little bit harder to find, and is technically an herbal tea (a tea made of non-tea plant leaves and materials), but is absolutely wonderful, and super beginner-friendly. If you can't find this, look for any "rooibos" teas that contain the words "honey" and/or "red" without too many superfluous flavors.

As for making the tea, look, I know this will sound obvious, but read the package and follow the directions. For some reason when it comes to both tea and pasta, people constantly think they know better than industry experts, do their own thing, and then complain about the results. Every tea is going to have its own preparation preferences, so it really is best to trust the experts, at least at first. After you've had a cup or two as recommended, then you can adjust to your own preference; I personally know I like to steep my teas a bit longer to make them a bit stronger and more bitter, but you gotta get that baseline first to know how to adjust. And then for serving, I'm a sugar guy myself. Not a ton, but even just a tiny amount can significantly enhance the flavor. Honey is a good option too, but doesn't pair great with every tea in my opinion. And for some reason a lot of Americans get weird and pissing contest-y about taking their tea black, but don't be afraid to try a splash of milk or half & half, just start small and increase in small increments until you find what you like. Personally I go no dairy about 90% of the time, but the times I do feels like a nice treat. If you've got Brunost on hand, drop a square of that in your cup, trust me, and a stroopwafel is never a bad addition either.

And sweet tea is an entirely different beast which I am extremely passionate about and of which none of the above applies, fyi.

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[–] chocosoldier@lemmy.blahaj.zone 36 points 4 months ago (1 children)

ITT people who think all coffee is like the Z-tier roasted-until-burnt held-until-stale blasphemy they serve at Starbucks.

ITT people who think all tea is the result of oversteeping a lipton bag in a cup in the microwave.

ITT people who think any random plant plus hot water is "tea" but are oddly specific about what is "coffee".

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[–] Zombiepirate@lemmy.world 33 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Coffee and tea are both delicious.

Energy drinks, on the other hand, taste like battery acid and bile. That's where your scorn should be directed.

[–] woelkchen@lemmy.world 23 points 4 months ago (1 children)

What else would give you energy if not literal battery juice?

[–] HikingVet@lemmy.ca 20 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Pure uncut methamphetamine.

[–] Slovene@feddit.nl 9 points 4 months ago

You're goddamn right.

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[–] TheMagicalTimonini@lemmy.world 32 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (5 children)

As an enthusiast for both leaf soup and bean juice, it seems like most coffee drinkers think of cheap, old, dusty teabag tea, overboiled to taste like bitter vegetables in sewage water, while most tea drinkers think of pure dark overroasted burnt coffee, preground too finely (or as the worst kind of instant coffee), tasting like acid in an ash tray, like those are your only two options.

Both coffee and tea can be so terrible and also so wonderful. I guess my favorite coffee takes quite some preparation and my favorite tea cost me about as much as a junkie's crack addiction. But both can be really nice if you spend a little more money on a quality product and take the bit of effort to prepare it properly.

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[–] JaymesRS@literature.cafe 31 points 4 months ago (1 children)

You can have my “Tea, Earl Grey, Hot” when you pry it from my cold dead fingers.

[–] Halosheep@lemm.ee 23 points 4 months ago

"Fingers, Dead, Cold"

[–] TheVeganWerewolf@lemmy.world 29 points 4 months ago (5 children)

The taste of tea is heavily dependent on how it gets brewed. Correct brewing temperature and time steeping play a huge role on making sure too many tannins aren’t extracted and it ends up tasting like hot garbage.

[–] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 25 points 4 months ago (1 children)

What you mean? Just dump the damn teabag in the hot water in your cup and a spoonful of honey.

Tastes like honey every time

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[–] Betch@lemmy.world 9 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Yup, green tea is great if you're not drinking factory floor dust and you haven't oversteeped it. If your tea is bitter and is leaving you with a dry mouth, something is wrong.

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[–] Mannimarco@lemmy.world 21 points 4 months ago

Both are good

[–] gmtom@lemmy.world 20 points 4 months ago (8 children)

Yeah man coffee tastes so good, which is why most people drink it half mixed with milk or full of flavoured syrups.

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[–] Skkorm@lemmy.world 19 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (8 children)

Bruh coffee is just a caffeine delivery juice, you have to put cream and sugar in it just so it doesn't taste super bitter. A lot of tea tastes good just on their own. Scoreboard.

[–] KrankyKong@lemmy.world 17 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Coffee tastes good on its own tho...

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[–] anti_antidote@lemmy.zip 12 points 4 months ago

Coffee is great, the problem is most coffee is brewed horribly. Get yourself a cheap pour over set and a kettle and you'll get significantly better results, with much more improvement possible past that with whole beans and a decent grinder

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[–] AFC1886VCC@reddthat.com 19 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Coffee tastes like hot soil juice

[–] Kichae@lemmy.ca 16 points 4 months ago (1 children)

I mean, it was ground this morning

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[–] Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de 19 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

Simplified down, coffee is burned seed wash water.

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[–] Jax@sh.itjust.works 16 points 4 months ago

Coffee is just bean soup

[–] son_named_bort@lemmy.world 15 points 4 months ago

As a soda drinker, I'm enjoying this cat fight.

This post brought to you by diabetes

[–] sigh@lemmy.world 15 points 4 months ago

Yeah whatever. Enjoy your heated bean water.

[–] AceFuzzLord@lemm.ee 14 points 4 months ago (3 children)

I personally find that tea tastes better usually than straight coffee. Can't stand straight coffee and need to go to a coffee shop to get a flavor I'll enjoy. But with tea, I can handle most teas I've tried without having to add anything that changes the flavor. I'll take the leaf juice over the bean juice any day, when we're talking no additional additives.

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[–] Mr_Blott@lemmy.world 14 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Coffee snobs who use those plastic capsule machines that produce bitter tarmac pishwater

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[–] femboy_bird@lemmy.blahaj.zone 14 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

I'll stick to my ~~chemistry experiment~~ energy drink

this comment is brought to you by my ~~addiction~~ enjoyment (i can stop) of monster zero

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[–] LazyBane@lemmy.world 13 points 4 months ago

Alright bean soup enjoyer.

[–] Rinna@lemm.ee 13 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

The problem is that the widely available tea brands (at least in America) are usually shit, and people not knowing how to make it right and end up using scalding hot water when making green tea or microwaving the water with the bag in. I get my tea from tea shops and use an electric kettle to get the brewing temps right, and now a lot of grocery store teas are disgusting to me.

I like good coffee too, but when I have it I often feel sick later and the caffeine content sometimes sets off my anxiety.

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[–] Furbag@lemmy.world 13 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Yes, I too prefer burnt bean water over hot leaf juice. Sorry, Uncle Iroh.

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[–] rbos@lemmy.ca 12 points 4 months ago (6 children)

I love how coffee smells, and heavily diluted in an icecap or something, it's fine.

Straight up, though? Disgusting. I've tried for years to develop the taste for it. No dice.

A well prepared tea just goes down easier.

Even a caffeine free green tea is a step above hot water. And I'll drink straight hot water on a cold day in a pinch.

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[–] blahsay@lemmy.world 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

My British half: Utter balderdash thou toadspotted codpiece!

[–] leraje@lemmy.blahaj.zone 16 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Is your British half about 500 years old?

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[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 10 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

SMH y'all just making water worse. Pure, undiluted water with just enough crap in it so that it doesn't literally strip your ions or something and kill you. That's the best drink.

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[–] recarsion@discuss.tchncs.de 10 points 4 months ago (3 children)

Bagged tea you get at the grocery store does suck, it either has no flavor or it's all artificially enhanced. Loose leaf is where it's at.

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