this post was submitted on 01 Dec 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

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Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

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6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


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[–] Mellow12@lemmy.world 170 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (3 children)

Look kids. If you wanna get Conjunctivitis, E. Coli, Hepatitis, or Tapeworms, in addition to your STD. By all means keep licking the chocolate starfish. You do you. But you don’t have to censor the word ‘ass’ if that’s your behavior.

[–] obscur_e@lemm.ee 64 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] FenrirIII@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago

Just make sure she's cleaning (hygiene AND STDs)

[–] rob_t_firefly@lemmy.world 24 points 3 weeks ago

Every time a censored meme gets posted to the group named "shitpost" a kitten wanders into traffic.

[–] SendMePhotos@lemmy.world 22 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

But what if it's a clean butt

[–] riodoro1@lemmy.world 36 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Look, if you’re trying to make excuses you’re gonna do it anyway. Until you wake up one day with your guts upside down and connect the dots.

[–] FundMECFSResearch@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

I wonder what the statistics on this are. Like we eat pussy and dick just fine, and those things all mix up with the sweat coming out of the ass. I mean usually it’s clean down there, but that’s not always the case.

[–] Dicska@lemmy.world 34 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

There was a doctor working in a relevant field commenting about this. I can't promise I'll find it, but the bottom line is that there's no such thing, due to how plain impossible it is to clean properly around the bottleneck. It's not smooth.

[–] prettybunnys@sh.itjust.works 10 points 3 weeks ago

There’s always one more fold is basically the tl;dr

[–] FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org 7 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Yea well there's also poop particles that fly out from your toilet when you flush and spread out across the bathroom and house. You have it on your toothbrush. But only severely immunocompromised people get sick from it. Stop fear mongering assplay.

[–] swab148@lemm.ee 5 points 3 weeks ago
[–] db2@lemmy.world 15 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

You do see the same words in the same basic order as the rest of us right?

[–] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 6 points 3 weeks ago

Hope springs eternal

[–] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 70 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

it's never seeing the kitchen that makes me go to the restaurant again

[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 32 points 3 weeks ago

Seeing the waste disposal area of a woman are what make me want to visit again.

Afk, gonna pass this revelation on to my wife.

[–] random_character_a@lemmy.world 27 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

There are "boy cooties" that turn you gay and then there are "girl gooties" that turn you in to a chad.

[–] Moc@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago

No need to supply a source, we know it’s from that groundbreaking paper from Based University.

[–] FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org 23 points 3 weeks ago

This is the prudish comment thread I've ever seen in my life.

[–] dQw4w9WgXcQ@lemm.ee 19 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm new to this. Does "shitpost" have to be litteral?

[–] DancingBear@midwest.social 18 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

People watching porn and obsessing over all the weird shit they see.

I never heard about eating ass until the internet and smart phones

Not trying to kink shame if that’s your thing but the internet is full of virgin young men who are obsessed with eating ass and fucking women’s asses.

[–] BarrelAgedBoredom@lemm.ee 47 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

Wikipedia says the term analingus was coined in the late 19th century and my cursory glance at google showed that there were explicit references to eating ass in early modern texts (~1500s). So tongue punching the fart box is at least as old as the Renaissance. Take the precautions you would normally take for butt stuff (disease free, recently bathed, haven't pooped or eaten in 3+ hours, an enema if you're fancy) and you should be just fine. Eating ass is fun and I will die on this hill

[–] callouscomic@lemm.ee 29 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

"tongue punching the fart box" and "Renaissance" in the same sentence.

Bravo.

[–] BarrelAgedBoredom@lemm.ee 8 points 3 weeks ago

It's what the Renaissance men would've wanted

[–] DandomRude@lemmy.world 8 points 3 weeks ago

Any girl who would touch him we would think could lick the arse of a diseased hangman.

Catullus (~84BC - ~54BC) The Carmina of Gaius Valerius Catullus. Leonard C. Smithers. London. Smithers. 1894.

[–] DancingBear@midwest.social 1 points 3 weeks ago

My original comment is more to the obsession with anal stuff that I believe has been heightened by easy access to porn.

You do you.

[–] FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org 19 points 3 weeks ago (9 children)

Oh sweet child. I don't think you or the people here understand what "kink" communities actual do with each other. Eating ass is vanilla to them. Eating ass is barely a "kink" and most people who do it aren't trying to do it all the time. It's just something that people do every once in a while.

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[–] vithigar@lemmy.ca 9 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I don't even understand the appeal for either of the involved parties. I don't want things in or around my asshole, nor do I want any involvement with those of others. For reasons that completely elude me there seems to have been a cultural shift during my life from butt stuff being deviant behavior and fodder for jokes to almost a default expectation.

I don't actually believe that it is a common expectation in real life dating between actual non-terminally-online people, but it certainly seems to be portrayed as such.

[–] DancingBear@midwest.social 11 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I mean, men do have the prostate in their butts?

[–] Ookami38@sh.itjust.works 16 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I don't think anyone's tongue is getting to the prostate. It's a ways up there.

[–] Opisek@lemmy.world 8 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] ellen_musk_0x@lemm.ee 1 points 3 weeks ago

(checks username) mmm hmm

[–] Kit@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

I don't have a high "body count" by any means but I've also never heard of anyone eating ass before the recent internet craze. I'm half convinced that it's just a meme.

[–] FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org 22 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

What in the actual hell are you guys talking about? The Internet didn't invent this. Assplay has been a thing for as long as we've been a species. Ya'll fucking delusional.

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[–] BluesF@lemmy.world 6 points 3 weeks ago

Nah man, people just love butt stuff. This is not really new, it's just more visible than ever.

[–] FundMECFSResearch@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Ehhh, I’ve done it, and people I’ve been with have specifically requested it. In my generation it seems to be a common thing.

Bout as kinky as fucking in the bathroom or something, or putting whipped cream on a dick, so like low level kinks.

Obviously you gotta be quite hygiene concious it you do it, I’ve only done it in the shower personally.

[–] DancingBear@midwest.social -5 points 3 weeks ago

I think people really are obsessed with it.

I think it’s more than a meme.

I’ve don’t quite a bit of “online research” and the results are telling.

[–] ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works 12 points 3 weeks ago

I feel like I can trust some assholes more than my friends' mouths. Part of the zeal is when there is knowledge and/or trust that preparations have been made, but I will not deny some folk are too trusting, too quickly. Which, bringing it full circle, is why I don't trust my friends' mouths.

Truly the paradox of our time.

[–] ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago

I'm the bottom picture for both.

If you don't tongue kiss the homies goodnight the way you'd tear into an ass we can't be friends.

[–] starbrite@lemmy.zip 6 points 3 weeks ago

Even with my insane sex drive, eating ass is one line i can't cross

[–] AbsoluteChicagoDog@lemm.ee 2 points 3 weeks ago

You can say ass on the internet

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