this post was submitted on 15 Oct 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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all 41 comments
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[–] TheRealLinga@sh.itjust.works 107 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Truly a wholesome and inspiring post!

OP should crosspost this to wholesome!!

[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 35 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It's definitely on the level of the average US "wholesome" story.

"Cancer riddled kid chooses to pay for classmates lunches instead of chemotherapy, dies with a happy smile"

[–] moriquende@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago

Capitalism allowed that kid to die happy

[–] No_Money_Just_Change@feddit.org 64 points 2 months ago

He is truly a good Catholic.
Murder victims go to heaven while you go straight down to the boiler room after suicide

Thots and payers, everyone

[–] Dpof@lemmy.world 26 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 23 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Nor condoms, it turns out.

[–] robocall@lemmy.world 8 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Can you get an STD from fucking a corpse?

[–] some_random_nick@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

It's not like the STD vanishes after ~~jumping~~ being pushed.

[–] FelixCress@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

Asking for a friend?

[–] Dpof@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago
[–] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Sounds like he's just an accomplice. Gravity is the killer.

[–] werefreeatlast@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

Actually the rocks, ground, water etc probably do the actual murdering. Gravity just plays the role of inevitable force or rather acceleration. Rally much innocent like the road is to a car crash even though you wouldn't have the same crash without the road.

[–] orcrist@lemm.ee 16 points 2 months ago

That's f****** brilliant.

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 14 points 2 months ago

Not all heroes wear capes.

[–] can@sh.itjust.works 13 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] bstix@feddit.dk 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

It doesn't mention a cause of death. Someone eventually pursueded hiim?

[–] kibiz0r@midwest.social 18 points 2 months ago (2 children)

He had an aneurysm, caused by a horrendous misspelling of the word β€œpersuaded”.

[–] bstix@feddit.dk 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

New phone.. my autocorrcors needs practice.

[–] Veneroso@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

Autobots roll out!

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

Oh no. Is this the fate of everyone who had the misfortune of reading that?

[–] FeelzGoodMan420@eviltoast.org 10 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (6 children)

Yeaaa.....I feel like this meme would be good if it got rid of the last part. That's just unnecessary.

[–] ProfessorProteus@lemmy.world 26 points 2 months ago

I don't think I could find it, but there's a different, older version of this meme with the same pic. The punchline is indeed the first part of this one, but it was done in a much more subtle way and didn't ruin the joke by spelling it out with "murder instead of suicide."

Shame on whoever stole the joke and then not only told it badly, but ended it with necrophilia.

[–] PhoreTwunny@lemmy.world 11 points 2 months ago (1 children)

That's the punchline, it's just very dark humor

Dark humor is like food. Not everyone gets it.

[–] bstix@feddit.dk 4 points 2 months ago

Someone linked his Wikipedia page elsewhere on this thread. Ofcourse the last part is made up, that's the joke, but the first part is the feel-good meme that made its rounds several years ago.

[–] Kecessa@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 months ago (2 children)

My thought as well, maybe change it to "so it can be an open casket wake" or something

[–] saltesc@lemmy.world 18 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

The shitpost should be less shitposty?

It'd still work, but that's against the whole point. I mean, you're just proving it worked as designed. That's quality shitposting.

[–] yamanii@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago

This is why you aren't making the jokes.

[–] mEEGal@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

welp, they got me in the first half, not gonna lie.

That's why I'd rather keep the last part

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

SexyLosers tier joke.