They haven't worked since all becoming for profit, rather than for... dating. Turns out setting people up should really be charity work, not for profit.
this post was submitted on 13 Feb 2025
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Maybe there should be a fediverse dating app?
Ah yes. A userbase of 45 global users, all of whom are argueing over linux distros, and none of them will speak one word when a woman walks into the room.
I'm prepared to use Windows 11 if it'll get me laid.
If that’s the criteria, those of us who cover many operating systems will be in high demand. Hot girls in my area want to see my home lab
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Perhaps some sort of digital federated glory hole could work?
Be very careful wheb defederating
To shreds you say?
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I'm pretty sure there is a FOSS dating app, but I can't remember the name of it.
I doubt it has a half decent userbase though.
There's a thousand nerds, two furries and a woman.
I feel like you're vastly underestimating the number of flurries on the fediverse.
maybe furry nerds were only counted as nerds
I don't know I assumed there were twice as many furries as women.
Furries just use barq instead
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Alovoa is the name.
Bots everywhere, randomly breaks every other week, accounts may of may not vanish if you looks at the logo the wrong way...
Got a match, conversation was going well, got ghosted. Still no idea why 😅.
Ok, zero matches within 100km, and I live just outside a major US city. Of course I’m probably not the typical age …. But it must be those pesky metric units, they mean nothing here
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A little late to the conversation there wired.
Match group killed most dating apps years ago when they acquired as many as possible and turned them all into tinder clones, literally removing useful features, not even including them in "premium" versions.
Hinge was the last to hold on to being "acceptable" to those that used it (I need more profile than pictures so I didn't care for it) but I guess that's changed now too.
Monetizing human needs never ends well... Seeking a partner is a human need and these corpo fucks know it and drooled over the prospect of exploiting it. I gave up on them a few years ago so I'm just staying single I guess.
Ok, here's how it works. You and me, we're going to care for each other, and be there for each other, and support each others dreams, and hug each other, and have wild kinky sex!
What? You too are also male?
disappears into the bush homer simpson style
.......wait, that bush thing could be taken out of context.....
Plot twist: he grabs you out of the bush and kiss
Ack! He grabs me by the bush??? Bad touch! Bad touch!
GETTING worse? No. They hit rock bottom like 5 years ago. You're just NOW figuring this out???
Those apps are like Google search. They are designed to keep you occupied, to make you pay for subscriptions and click on ads.
They are not designed to find you a good partner.
All non-free and open source apps made by for-profit entities always get worse.
I think Steam is an outlier here. It'll probably get worse eventually, but it's pretty decent right now.
The last time dating apps worked was before 2010. Why are we apparently only noticing this issue now?
Can they get worse?
Also, were they ever good?
OKCupid was alright before the buyout. I won't say it was great, but I went out with several people thanks to that site and met my current partner of 12 years there.
okc was pretty great back in the day
For a short time until they get enough market share and they switch on monetization.
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Blame Match Group - they own almost all of them.
Yes, and more rapey.
https://themarkup.org/investigations/2025/02/13/dating-app-tinder-hinge-cover-up
Does anyone have suggestions for anything decent dating wise since I'm sure lots of people seeing this post also want to find the best ways to date?
I think at this point actual human interaction is probably more positive than dating apps. Which is a pretty sorry state of affairs and I'm not keen on it. I don't want to meet people I want algorithms to do it for me, we're supposed to live in the future damn it.
I never really had trouble getting dates on Tinder, etc., but very few of those led to second dates. Of the people I've dated that I met without the help of apps, I probably would've "swiped left" on most of them. As another user said, general human interaction is my current route, focusing my energy on social interactions where I can meet people the old fashioned way: mostly friends of friends. That can range from get togethers at someone's house, happy hours, general meetup groups, volunteering, hobbies and/or classes.
This, I think I had over 100 first dates and maybe 10 second dates. I’m not a catfish by any means, but I think people just come off differently over text than in-person, it can be kind of a whiplash.
Yeah, I used to want to text a lot before meeting face to face, but have learned that almost always means I start to "fill in the blanks" and the person I meet never matches up with my expectations. By meeting face to face quickly, I don't have a chance to build those expectations and am unlikely to feel "catfished" by anything other than blantant lies on their profile.
I think the bigger problem is that the apps really amplify the sense of "there's always more fish in the sea." So if that first date wasn't full of sparks, people often prefer to see what other options are out there, rather than going on second dates to see if anything develops.
With the online approach, I know I'm very guilty of focusing on the other person's "flaws", and deciding they're deal breakers. With people I meet via offline methods, we generally get to know each other a bit more organically and end up having multiple unofficial "dates" before the first official date.
My last actual date was over a year ago, with someone I met offline through mutual friends. There was definitely an initial spark, but it fizzled almost as quickly (mostly my own discomfort with emotional intimacy). We're actually still friends though, and hang out with each other more often than I hang out with the friend who introduced us. If we had met via dating apps, I highly doubt we would still be friends because we just wouldn't have any reason to cross paths organically.
Going out, doing stuff you like and talking to people. I love raves, so that's where I generally meet people for dates. I've gotten dates at board game evenings, doing sports, or in a museum.
You just gotta talk to someone who has caught your eye. Make sure to let them know you find them attractive and if it's mutual you've got a thing. Rejections are normal and okay, at this point I'm more comfortable with them than actually going on a date :P
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Beats me, I haven't used one in ages
I met my wife via online dating just before Covid...
Feel like I caught the last chopper out of 'Nam.
Tell me you haven't used a dating site in 15 years without telling me you haven't used a dating site in 15 years
Yeah, the dating apps are monetized to all hell, you guys have called it right.
I was on them a decade ago, and I'm classically handsome, mentally stable, good job, etc; went looking for a serious partner with similar life goals, and all I got was catfishing and trolls.
After I subscribed to the premium tier, I began getting messages from real people but I was so disgusted by the transparent greed that I swore off all dating websites and services and went the offline route, meeting my current SO through real life friends at a social event.
Starve the beast, as the conservatives say. Deny them their money.
Just need to be sure to buy all the flairs and special options and it'll surely work this year...
The best dating app is not being interested in having a relationship and playing video games until you randomly stumble across a switch gaming discord and randomly fall in love with your best friend and they like you back 🥴
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