Microblog Memes
A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.
Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.
Rules:
- Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
- Be nice.
- No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
- Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.
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You don't lie, lying will get you into trouble. You just don't mention it if they don't ask. And if they don't ask it's probably not that important. Most job descriptions are like Christmas wishlists anyway, they will be happy if they get half of it.
These days you're called different with a sexy word neurodivergent when you tell the truth.
Like this person I also find this strange. And like this person I also have problems during job interviews. I mean, I'm not bullshitting you and I expect you to do the same. But alas, it's often bullshit and lowballing all the way.
You are looking at job applications from the wrong perspective. You are seeing the job description and seeing minimum requirements, when in 90% they are describing the ideal candidate that will probably never show up.
And I want to emphasise, you shouldn't lie, you shouldn't pad your résumé, but you should also not volunteer to testify against yourself.
My wife is super bad at not volunteering information.
She's partially deaf and a few other issues that make phone conversations hard, so she often asks me to sit in and listen to explain anything she didn't catch, and make sure she heard everything correctly.
I'm often making the neck cut "stop talking/mute mic" motion to get her to stop saying things the other people don't need to hear.
For instance, she quit a previous job over an employee basically stalking her while she was on the property, and screaming in her face over any imagined sleight. This employee was a problem with others as well, but who you know is more important than how you work in some places so nothing was ever done.
The other places she interviews with don't need the whole back story of why she quit. "Safety concerns" is completely correct, and leaves out the possibility that the new job might think you don't work well with others. She does. The other guy didn't.
So every time she starts telling the potential employer about it, I cut her off to remind her of that.
I'm very much the "ALL my information is need to know and you don't need to know" kind of person when it comes to things like that, and she just kind of vomits words all over the place when she feels uncomfortable.
Yes, minimum requirements are not actually minimum requirements. So silly for people taking things literally.
That’s the thing, they aren’t minimum requirements. They’re a form that HR fills out based on what HR thinks the job is, not based on what the actual job is.
i often see a list of minimum and preferred.
That doesn’t mean anything, unless you’re in a field with government mandated certifications. If you know someone that already works there, ask them to submit your resume to get around the automatic rejections.
It's only wrong if you get caught!
I find it entertaining that the criteria for neurodivergence includes telling the truth.
I find it concerning that lying is apparently always an option for NTs.
I’m autistic and lying is always an option for me too. I’m extremely good at it. I just don’t do it, because it’s wrong and harmful.
I'm not telling you not tell the truth, I'm telling you to consider that list of skills on a job description is a wishlist and only answer what is asked in the interview.
I've interviewed more people than I can count, leading to more hirings than I can count, and I don't remember any case where the candidate met all the checkboxes on the ideal skillset. Because what goes in the job description is the perfect candidate not the minimum.
Before I graduated I was encouraged to apply for a job that required a four year degree.
Don't worry about it - we know you, they said.
When I submitted my application online it was automatically rejected because the application program correctly flagged that I didn't meet the requirement of having a four year degree.
This is when you call them directly and tell them that. They can override the automation.
and if they won't/can't, then there's an easy answer as to whether it's worth working there at all
Why yes, I do thrive under pressure. It's why I use a weighted blanket.
I’d like to be
Under the sea
In an octopus’s garden
in the shade
a friend once got me a job interview with his company. he listened into the interview, and i could hear him audibly gasp when the interviewer asked, "why do you want to work for us?". I replied plainly, "To make a living so that I may pursue my real goals." I didn't get the job...
I'm not technically NT but I have ADHD and I don't have problems picking up this sort of neurotypical social cues.
When I interview people myself, I'm extra wary of catering to ND people, and for questions like this, I phrase them very carefully to mean what I want to ask:
"Why do you want to work for us? I'm sure there were other jobs out there that would result in a salary, but what made you apply for this one specifically?"
I make clear in the conversation that I want to know their motivation, their alignment to the specific role, and not the fact that they need money to live. I already know that! So I tailor the questions to give me exactly what I need even if the person is, say, autistic and takes things in the most literal way.
This post has, however, made me realise that in the job posting I have open right now, I'm going to add a note in the vein of "this is a wishlist of all the things the ideal candidate would have, but we acknowledge nobody is ever a 100% perfect match - feel free to apply even if you only meet some of the criteria as you might be more qualified than most applicants".
I have always appreciated the listings that divide the list between the "must haves," even soft ones (e.g. 4yr degree, knowledge of X tool, Y years of experience, solid communication skills), and "our ideal candidate will have most of the following" (e.g. Y+3 years of experience, prior role in management, knowledge of Z regulation).
The 4 year degree one is still never a must have. The only things that are true must haves are certifications for federally regulated jobs, like requiring a PE.
Those HR people who make the listing don't understand most of it anyway.
Yes, and then don’t provide “real” answers at the interview, make up stuff they want to hear, be friendly and create small talk with a complete stranger, act like you actually GAF about the company when all you want to do is just get a job and start working, screw all this people-interaction stuff.
For me, getting the interview is the hard part.
I've never interviewed for a job where I didn't get the offer. I can't say exactly what works for me, but I can explain my process a bit.
First off, I go in confident. a lot of that probably had to do with my history with interviews, but that's the first part.
Secondly, I look at it as me interviewing the company. I want to know the company is right for me. To that end, I ask a lot of questions about the position and the team. I ask if they're looking to fill a hole or are willing to have the role reinvented.
Obviously, that last bit is for taking a unique role in the comment, not just as cashier number 23.
I am also clear that I'm not looking to remain in that position forever. I want to work at it a few years and move on, wither within the company or elsewhere. I won't bail in 6 months, but I also won't do the same job with no evolution for 10 years. My career needs to grow.
Essentially, I try to interview in a manner where they're trying to win me over instead of weed me out.
I'm my current job, I was relaxed, got the interviewers talking family and casually about the projects, started giving feedback on issues as if I was already on board, and essentially changed it from an interview to a group meeting.
It turns out I was asking for about 30% more than my competition, but they gave it to me anyway, and it all came down to making myself feel like a member of the team they wanted to hold onto rather than just someone looking for a paycheck.
And I'm absolutely there for the paycheck. I liked my old job a lot more, but I got like a 60% pay bump going to the new job.
Half of the requirements listed aren't even actual requirements; they're just listing their tech stack. For example, if I see NodeJS, I know I'll be deploying web apps, not coding them. I don't even read the requirements most of the time. If the title matches and there's no security clearance required, I'm applying.
I swear my company has one list of requirements for all jobs. Every time I am part of the hiring process I have to correct it
That whole routine doesn't magically make sense to neurotypical people either.
I think of myself as a neutodivergent person but I am annoyed by neurodivergent people who act like everything is binary yes/no black/white full volume/absolute silence. Like, everyone in the world knows that the gas pedal in the car is not an on/off switch and believe it or not but other things in life are like that.
Get out of here with your smart and reasonable take!
Even if you don't qualify, job hunting is just throwing your resume to the wall and see what sticks. You got nothing to lose by applying.
You got nothing to lose by applying.
Nothing to lose but your sanity.
and self esteem when a CV scanning AI sends you an automated rejection e-mail how you're not qualified to work a job that specifically has "no qualifications or experience needed!" written in the listing
logic knows it's bullshit, but man, it still stings to read
the hiring managers, senior executives, and especially the owners-- don't give half a flying fuck about the ~~worker drones~~ employees
as such, you're only hurting yourself if you're not telling them what they want to hear out of "principle." fuck that. "principle" won't stop them from tossing you to the winds the instant you become any sort of liability, e.g., prolonged sickness, otj injury, pregnant, etc