this post was submitted on 27 Nov 2024
1010 points (99.4% liked)

Microblog Memes

6022 readers
1845 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

Related communities:

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 32 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] late_night@sopuli.xyz 95 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] PumpkinSkink@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago

Thank you for posting this. I was gonna try and paraphrase it because what is being said is so spot on to this sentiment.

[–] Clinicallydepressedpoochie@lemmy.world 46 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

If I had a felony conviction I'd be applying everywhere answering the phone like, "oh right, you can be president but not manager of a dave and busters."

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 16 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Sorry, but you need 33 more convictions to qualify for that position.

[–] Clinicallydepressedpoochie@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)

No problem, coming right up, first one is intimidation for threatening to stick my foot up your bum.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago

Sorry, I refused to file charges because I ain't no snitch. It would have been reduced to a misdemeanor anyways. You're going to need to try harder.

[–] kreskin@lemmy.world 2 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Unfortunately for you, that's called "menace" and its merely a misdemeanor.
You'll need to do more than this to get a proper conviction-- aggravating the charge by involving a weapon or minors might be a good option for your goals. You need to be much more creative with your criminality if you ever want to enter the gentry class. Consider white collar crime, or creating jobs by hiring some minions. Now that trump is in office, it will be a particularly attractive time to venture into federal crimes, or crimes that cross state or national boundaries.

(/s)

[–] photonic_sorcerer@lemmy.dbzer0.com 37 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

You can be incompetent and get any job, but you have to be willing to be an asshole and remove your backbone.

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 7 points 3 weeks ago

Of course there is a catch

[–] MinFapper@startrek.website 4 points 3 weeks ago

And have very rich parents

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 24 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

“Brought to you by Carl’s Jr.”

[–] Delphia@lemmy.world 22 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Come on, thats an unfair conparison.

President Camacho actually wanted to fix things.

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 3 points 3 weeks ago

And listened to people smarter than him.

[–] DandomRude@lemmy.world 3 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Yea, I mean, he apparently even traveled back in time to try to save cheese for future generations. But I'm afraid that was a futile attempt, because the US citizens have nevertheless set the course that will lead us to the timeline where there is no more cheese.

[–] salvaria@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 3 weeks ago

"Fuck you! I'm eating"

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago

"I love you"

[–] Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 18 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Laser@feddit.org 16 points 3 weeks ago

Qualified? Yes. Actually become? No

[–] TheDemonBuer@lemmy.world 18 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

We are a profoundly stupid country. Even the intelligent, educated people are stupid, because they didn't think this could happen, and they have no idea how to fix it.

[–] Bread@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 weeks ago

I like to think my belief that humanity has some decency meant there was no way it could possibly happen. Yet life is often stranger and dumber than fiction.

[–] Spacehooks@reddthat.com 18 points 3 weeks ago

trump proved to me Anyone can be anything*

*with Rich parents or leech to guy with rich parents.

[–] daddy32@lemmy.world 8 points 3 weeks ago

True american dream, no?

[–] Sabata11792@ani.social 8 points 3 weeks ago

If I drink enough bleach and lead, one day I could convince 60% of the country to put me in charge.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 7 points 3 weeks ago

Pretty sure most of us here would be overqualified, based on the apparent criteria.

[–] peteypete420@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

OK assuming it wasn't with this group of assholes, if you could add yourself as secretary of something, what would it be?

I'd be secretary of proper fantasy and fictious IP respect.

Proper fucking labeling when a story moves from one media to another.

TV shows like Wheel of Time can only say they are loosely based on the WoT books. I'm not saying every adaptation has to stay as true to its origin as the Sin City movie, but come one with some of these

[–] chiliedogg@lemmy.world 3 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

IIRC, in the Jason Bourne books, the super-secret government cabal that trained him are the good guys.

[–] peteypete420@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 weeks ago

Hrrrmmm. OK I'm not familiar with the OG Jason Bourne material. But your complaint is registered and you may be called upon to testify. It can take 5 years to 9 lifetimes before I read the things.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 4 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Does that mean I'm allowed to vent and ignore visual tasks?

[–] badcodecat@lemux.minnix.dev 4 points 3 weeks ago

among us?!?

[–] FauxPseudo@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago

I won Time's Person of the Year in 2006. I have no worries about imposter syndrome. I've already been validated.