Ask Lemmy

I call everyone dude, or man, especially when I’m excited. Idc what your gender is, you’re still my dude.

That Lemmy hasn't devolved into an incel freak show is a barely functional alliance between the left lean and heavy moderation against the fact that Lemmy skews into Extra Opinionated Redditors (aka nerdy, lonely men)

When some poor lady tried to get a TwoX going here the comment sections were always a sausage fest of attempting to mansplain away women's personal experiences and concerns and that's really all you need to know about things.

Not a lot as far as I can tell?

Zero. Everyone is anonymous. So who cares.

I'm a lady and haven't had any trouble here. The only place I really notice how ridiculously male - skewed Lemmy is, is on the NSFW. That is definitely all "male gaze" stuff, with the occasional actual lesbian also posting stuff guys like. Even the posts OF men are FOR men, everything posted with some assumption only men are looking at the posts.

The other communities just aren't so gendered, I don't notice much whether someone seems to be one or the other, it isn't relevant to cocktails or cooking or gardening or science fiction.

The shills and bots from Hexbear love using it as a wedge to divide people, so I'd say it's very important to them

on the internet everyone is just a wall of text to me. (pronouns: it/its)

Not much at all.

How would people even know other peoples gender?

There are people who share their pronouns/gender, but they are pretty rare

Why not make a new account with a femme sounding username and see? Don’t pretend you need help with a bra or anything, just interact with lemmy while “labeled” a woman.

I have a more masculine username and a more feminine username (both seem like spins on given names, think UrArthUr and Bekky), and there is a difference in how I’m perceived, or at least how people respond to me. It’s not huge, and I’m afab irl, so I’m also not surprised- I don’t think I’ve ever been somewhere where people can freely interact and it had no effect (or at least not since I grew tits).

Depends on context, as always. A user sharing a story on social interaction, gender may be quite important to how they experienced it and how others perceive it. I.e., a post the other day asking about worst dates and the average worst date for men was a woman on coke or a no show. The average worst date for women was about getting sexually assaulted or raped.

Men are victims of those things too and can face different repercussions when they try to pursue help. Understanding their experiences within the context of them being men is also important.

Stripping gender from these stories only obfuscates some of the problems.

Not at all! What matters is the person and what they have to say. If it's good content I'll upvote and chime in! 😃

Beneath each woman is a man, and beneath him is a teenage boy, and beneath him is a bot. After that, it's bots all the way down.

Doesn't matter at all. A person is a person.

Lemmy is definitely a more male space than I think even reddit was, and that does affect the tone of certain conversations. It really is a whiplash coming here from Mastodon sometimes and seeing a very different vibe.

Identity in general doesn't matter much on forums (as opposed to microblogs, like Twitter or Mastodon). Forums are focused on topics rather than people, and what is said is generally more important than who says it.