this post was submitted on 10 Jun 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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top 14 comments
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[–] Zehzin@lemmy.world 40 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)
[–] finley@lemm.ee 25 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

This version from the gospel of John is far more interesting than the others, what with all the whipping.

And not just any whip: Jesus made it from a leather thong from his own sandal, switches (small, thin branches) from a nearby tree, and broken pieces of pottery on the ground! That’s a very nasty whip!

[–] cm0002@lemmy.world 23 points 3 months ago (1 children)

AND he's using it against merchants/elites/the rich, this is the version of Jesus I can get behind!

[–] can@sh.itjust.works 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

No one ever talks about the type of Jesus I could get behind.

[–] PlasticExistence@lemmy.world 4 points 3 months ago

Is it the one with amazing abs?

[–] ummthatguy@lemmy.world 23 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

So you're saying it's part chankla? Formidable indeed.

[–] essell@lemmy.world 15 points 3 months ago (1 children)

The first rule of god club is you have to continuously talk about god club

[–] Kowowow@lemmy.ca 6 points 3 months ago

As is foretold

[–] Lepsea@sh.itjust.works 10 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

Maybe he wants to show his move

[–] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 5 points 3 months ago

Or maybe he just wants to play some tunes

[–] Syltti@lemmy.world 9 points 3 months ago

Satan won't be catching anything. He's going to be chilling on the sidelines with us as we get front-row seats to Jesus getting his ass beat by a Bible thumper who is mad about Jesus not voting for Trump.

[–] samus12345@lemmy.world 7 points 3 months ago

Satan: "Bring it!"

[–] Whirling_Cloudburst@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

That's not fair though. 6AM is too early and you know it. After a long night of partying that amounts to a handicap.

[–] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 1 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Have you tried not doing that?

Also, where does it say AM on that sign?