this post was submitted on 07 Sep 2023
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On Friday, an international Delta flight bound for sunny Barcelona was forced to U-turn back to its starting point, Atlanta, for an exceedingly rare air travel horror: a passenger had suffered diarrhea throughout the plane's aisle so extensively that completing the flight was deemed untenable.

News of the incident first hit Reddit's r/ATC subreddit, to which a user shared alarming FAA flight information marking the ill-fated flight's decision to turn around.

"DIVERT TO ATL — PASSENGER DIARRHEA ALL OVER A/C," the flight strip read. "BIOHAZARD."

We tracked one of the plane's unlucky passengers down — and they confirmed that the diarrhea was, in fact, "ALL OVER" the cabin aisles, just as that flight strip read.

"I woke up and there was a bit of a strange smell," the passenger, who chose to remain anonymous while speaking of his Diarrhea Plane experience, told Futurism, adding that the flight attendants were forced to perform some DIY ingenuity to deal with the excrement.

"They found everything they could use," said the passenger, explaining that the airline staff used aprons to craft "makeshift biohazard suits" to wear while dealing with the defecatory disaster. Blankets and napkins, meanwhile, were utilized to cover the feces.

You might be imagining that Delta obviously just got these travelers a new plane, right? After all, this one was covered in human feces. But alas, there seemingly weren't enough jets to go around, and according to the passenger, the airline ultimately settled the issue by simply ripping out the Airbus' soiled carpets and giving the passenger plane an extra-thorough clean before reboarding it.

"They actually took out all the carpets for one section of it," the passenger said. "We were waiting three hours at the airport while they were trying to clean it, but they couldn't clean it, so they had to rip off the carpet and change it."

"Then we were back on," they added. "No problem."

The passenger also noted that the plane's staff fully switched over for the second flight attempt, which we're glad to hear. Anyone who's forced to make a biohazard suit out of aprons and proceeds to manage an in-flight diarrhea crisis for the next several hours deserves some time off, not to mention a raise.

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[–] Wahots@pawb.social 162 points 1 year ago (6 children)

Oh god, the poor person who shat themselves into the international headlines. That's one for the books. Poor bastard.

[–] SCB@lemmy.world 31 points 1 year ago

"Hey honey, how was your flight?"

Lol

[–] Son_of_dad@lemmy.world 30 points 1 year ago (3 children)

You just know he wasn't feeling well all day and probably knew he shouldn't get in that flight

[–] dudinax@programming.dev 39 points 1 year ago

Maybe, but truly explosive diarrhea can come on suddenly.

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[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 28 points 1 year ago (2 children)

At least they aren't named. Only the people they were with would know it was them.

Or they could even be proud.

"You ever take down a whole plane just by having diarrhea? I have."

[–] buddascrayon@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago (2 children)

No but as a kid (8 or 9 years old) I shut down a restaurant by puking all over it. Not just for the night either, I closed them down for good. We went back to the area 2 weeks later and they were shuttered. That was the last time my parents refused to believe me when I told them I was feeling sick.

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[–] joel_feila@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago

The correct title is poo bastard

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[–] MsPenguinette@lemmy.world 162 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (8 children)

You know how when you are falling asleep but have an embarrassing memory jolt you awake? Or when you are driving and have a memory that makes you suddenly scream?

The shitter will never have internal peace. I can't imagine much more of an embarrassing situation. Poor guy

[–] Saneless@sh.itjust.works 60 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My gf asked me what I'd do if I was the plane shitter

Without hesitation I simply replied "change my name and my face"

That's pretty much all you can do

[–] ikapoz@sh.itjust.works 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

“Do you know how I got these scars?”

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[–] peopleproblems@lemmy.world 41 points 1 year ago (5 children)

I feel terrible for him too. Some people go their entire lives never knowing the kind of fear that develops with a bad case of diarrhea, and consequently don't understand how horrible it is to live with IBS.

I have no words for what he's going through, other than I hope he has family and friends that are more supportive than mine and more supportive than most commentors.

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[–] BEZORP@kbin.social 32 points 1 year ago (1 children)

On the flip side, they are immune to any other "cringe attacks" that come up. Who knows it might be strangely liberating

[–] BruceCampbellschin@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] muse@kbin.social 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)
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[–] mrbubblesort@kbin.social 18 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Poor guy for sure, but at this point I might just own it and get ahead of it. Get paid a few bucks to do an interview with Jimmy Kimmel, apologize profusely, blame it all on airline food or medication or something

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[–] gibmiser@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I hope they were on their way to the bathroom. If so I would have never left the bathroom for the remainder of the flight

[–] MsPenguinette@lemmy.world 32 points 1 year ago (3 children)

In the full article, it said they kept the guy in the bathroom till a few minutes before landing. I'd absolutely refuse to leave the bathroom till it's been deplaned

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[–] Bodongs@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago (3 children)
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[–] bloopernova@programming.dev 103 points 1 year ago (3 children)

"ill-fated diarrhea plane"

What a beautiful phrase. Shakespearean.

[–] DiatomeceousGirth@lemmy.world 48 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Maggie was on point with this article. "Defacatory disaster" is top tier journalism.

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[–] argh_another_username@lemmy.ca 14 points 1 year ago

Chef’s kiss for the image, with its brown trail.

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[–] Art3sian@lemmy.world 76 points 1 year ago (10 children)

I need to understand how one explodes diarrhoea so violently that it extends the length of the aisle of an entire plane… while fully clothed.

Maybe it was a lady in a skirt.

[–] Wahots@pawb.social 69 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (4 children)

If/when you get salmonella poisoning, you will find out. I didn't understand how people died of diarrhea-based diseases until then. You shit literal liquid every 30 minutes or less, for like two weeks, and it's unstoppable. In my case, it never really did get better. I got diagnosed with virally induced ibs and nothing ever worked quite right after that. It's been three years since I ate that recalled food (which wasn't in recall at the time, yay).

Salmonella feels less like a disease, and more like you accidentally ingested some sort of rat poison and your body is desperately trying to get it out by making you vomit and shit like crazy so it doesn't stay in you.

It's the only time I actually wished for a cork, or perhaps adult diapers. It was a new low for me, I felt like I was gonna die, lol.

[–] somethingsnappy@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago

Bacterial induced IBS, but yikes.

[–] uberkalden@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago (8 children)

Holy shit. You still have problems?

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[–] Colour_me_triggered@lemm.ee 29 points 1 year ago
  1. Get out of seat at back of plane.

  2. Turbulence knocks you on your ass and shite out of your ass.

  3. At this point the floodgates have opened and you need to just get to the toilet asap for damage control.

  4. Run down aisle with shite dripping out of your trouser leg.

  5. Read about the time you "exploded like a chocolate grenade in the middle of the plane" in the paper.

[–] Son_of_dad@lemmy.world 24 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm picturing the guy running up and down the plane, just spraying shit everywhere like a South park episode.

"Hot hot hot hot hot hot!"

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[–] aidan@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Probably was waiting for the toilet and just couldn't hold it, then was running back and forth between bathrooms trying to get in one.

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[–] Nastybutler@lemmy.world 53 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I don't know if it's possible to literally die of embarrassment, but if there's anytime I'd wish it was it would be in this situation if it happened to me

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[–] wildtamaskan@yiffit.net 50 points 1 year ago (3 children)

At least they didn't force passengers to disembark or sit on the soiled seats like Air Canada did

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[–] zero_spelled_with_an_ecks@programming.dev 39 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Is this the end result of trying not to poop for three days?

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[–] LillyPip@lemmy.ca 32 points 1 year ago (3 children)

As someone with severe GI issues, this is exactly why I won’t travel. I can’t imagine the embarrassment that person is now living with. I’ve seen like six articles on this in my newsfeed today. I’d be utterly mortified.

I don’t even like commenting on this because I’m contributing to its visibility, but GI issues are completely debilitating and no joke. You can’t control it, and even adults don’t seem to understand. I’m just so sad for the person at the centre of this who will never live it down. :(

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[–] Ser_Salty@feddit.de 32 points 1 year ago
[–] reagansrottencorpse@lemmy.world 23 points 1 year ago

The brown exhaust coming out of the plane in the article was a nice touch.

[–] Iwasondigg@lemmy.one 22 points 1 year ago (5 children)

I. Don't. Huh? How? The passenger was wearing pants right? What??

[–] dudinax@programming.dev 19 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Any parents know. Twice I've seen kids shit so hard it came out the neck of their shirts.

[–] Murais@lemmy.one 12 points 1 year ago

When my little sister was a toddler, she was wearing one of those one piece zip up pajama suits.

Just her, me, and my dad home one day. Suddenly smell an awful, gut-churning smell in the house.

Go to pick up sister, sister goes squish in a place that should not squish. Noped out (I was 9 at the time) and told dad.

Dad notices the squish. Takes the toddler to the sink and unzips the pajama suit.

SHE FILLED IT.

UP TO THE TOP.

ZERO SURFACE AREA LEFT UNSOILED.

Several hours of gagging later, we survive.

Pajama suit is now a cursed object. Tossed it in the fire pit outside to avoid the smell being inside forever.

Forever burned into my brain.

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[–] dantheclamman@lemmy.world 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Frankly I can't see why they didn't just alert ATC that there was a "health incident" and then tell ground crews on a closed channel what to expect. Would have potentially limited how broadly this news went out

[–] Serinus@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's going to leak from a passenger anyway (pun intended), so it doesn't really matter if they try to hide it.

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[–] randomaccount43543@lemmy.world 18 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

From r/ATC:

279 DAL194 H/A359/L 3157 496 PSK125017 E0153 360 KATL./. GVE224037.. FLASK.OZZZI1.KATL ODIVERT TO ATL- PASSENGER DIARRHEA ALL OVER A/ C- BIOHAZARD

https://imgpile.com/images/CSwWMj.jpg

https://old.reddit.com/r/ATC/comments/167s16f/oh_no/

[–] evatronic@lemm.ee 13 points 1 year ago (2 children)

My favorite part of this story has consistently been imagining the poor person that has to figure out how to communicate this in so few words. Like, "How should I word this? Restroom mishap? No, it's not just the restroom. Passenger soiled in aisle? No, it's mo--" "BITCH JUST SAY DIARRHEA ALL OVER JESUS!"

[–] Ser_Salty@feddit.de 13 points 1 year ago (3 children)
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[–] anon_8675309@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago

My nightmare is to get a case of the shits while in a tube 7 miles up in the air.

[–] AssPennies@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago (2 children)

We call it: "The Aristocrats"!

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[–] mlong99@lemm.ee 12 points 1 year ago

I wonder if the cleaned plane still had some lingering aroma. They have just booked flights on competitors for these passengers or offered them a hotel

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