this post was submitted on 07 May 2025
554 points (96.8% liked)

Greentext

6211 readers
831 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 73 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That was essentially what I was going to comment.

You punch a skull like that, you're breaking knuckles. It happens vs other humans as it is, no way do you punch a gorilla in the face and do even the same amount of damage your hand takes. You're sure as hell not knocking it out.

As entertainment, the idea is awesome, because I can imagine this relatively small guy squaring up against a silverback, all confident and executing the footwork perfectly, throwing a right hook just as hard as he can, and then there's a spray of blood from his hand, followed by the gorilla turning him into steak tartare in a minute or less.

Has dude never been to a zoo that has gorillas? Back in my prime, I would have been a heavyweight, and I feel like a damn twig next to a gorilla, no matter how much height I have on one. And I've never been that close to one. Seeing them twelve feet away was intimidating as hell.

[–] Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 42 points 1 day ago (3 children)

They're fearsome in a fight, but even more admirably, they don't take themselves that seriously

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7HmuTqe9s88

Worth it to watch even for the first couple minutes to hear the sound

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 day ago

I haven't watched the video yet, everyone is asleep and my headphones are in another room.

But I love your user name, and felt you needed to know that immediately

[–] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 day ago

I love this guy's content. Maybe because it's related to nature in all its deadly splendour, but I often do a double-take on the 'will kill you' euphemisms.

This guy needs to reboot Hinterland Who's Who for Canada.

[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

And yes, very much worth watching!

(~o ̄3 ̄)~🍌