this post was submitted on 22 Oct 2024
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I know staying up past bedtime is illegal but I did it once to check and fortnite was in fact off ๐Ÿ˜”

Truly terrible news

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[โ€“] HiddenLayer555@lemmy.ml 76 points 1 week ago (5 children)

Easiest way to do this: Turn the modem off after bed time (you will also lose internet)

Most expensive but still easy way to do this: Buy a "smart router" with time-based parental controls (lets you use the internet at night).

Nerd way to do this: Pihole with a script that enables and disables certain blocklists at certain times (free and open source, because fuck "smart" products)

[โ€“] ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca 23 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Most expensive: Buy a controlling share of Epic

[โ€“] MoogleMaestro@lemmy.zip 7 points 6 days ago

The Elon Musk method: Buy some shit for no reason with only the attempt to ruin it because, idk, oligarchy or some shit.

[โ€“] bstix@feddit.dk 12 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

The cheapst way is this: Don't lie to your children. Take responsibility for your choices. Talk to your children and explain why an adult needs to make responsible choices.

[โ€“] Wes4Humanity@lemm.ee 10 points 6 days ago

I agree with all of this... Might cost you some time and fights depending on how poorly you did raising the kid to this age though... But now this kid is going to go into school adamant that the game can't be played at night... You've set him up for serious ridicule because you're too lazy to parent well

[โ€“] sudoku@programming.dev 41 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Cheaper alternative: flash existing router with DD-WRT or OpenWRT and access advanced features for free.

[โ€“] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago (1 children)

A true nerd has at least one spare raspberry pi laying around. Or just an old box they can throw Linux on.

[โ€“] SinJab0n@mujico.org 1 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

Yeah, but as a true nerd i wont be using my old pi 3 to do that.

The poor bastard is strugling to keep home assintant alive. Better buy a new router WRT compatible.

[โ€“] JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 11 points 1 week ago

And possibly get a damn nice router for not much money.

Sent via my Xiaomi AX6S

[โ€“] sunflowercowboy@feddit.org 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[โ€“] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 6 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I like this one. The Internet still works after 9pm but you're reduced to 56k speeds. After 10pm it goes to 28.8k. After 11pm: 2400 baud.

That's hilarious, but I was picturing the classic ethernet cord wired to a light switch

[โ€“] Saeculum@hexbear.net 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It provides enrichment for the kids, as they figure out how to get past it.

[โ€“] psivchaz@reddthat.com 3 points 6 days ago

As a nerd, I don't expect my parental control settings to work forever. They're more there to prevent childish naivete from getting them into trouble, they probably won't stop dedicated teen horniness. And I won't even be mad, figuring out how to get around them requires learning more about how technology works.