this post was submitted on 18 Jun 2024
190 points (92.8% liked)
Asklemmy
44149 readers
1439 users here now
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
Search asklemmy ๐
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- !lemmy411@lemmy.ca: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
No, it's not socially acceptable. Yes, I wish it were. I don't know if I'd go for full on snuggling but I come from a physically affectionate family and in general wish people were more comfortable with that kind of thing
Interesting. I come from a family that wasn't very physically affectionate, and I hug most of my friends every time I see them.
I go for the hug when I see friends I haven't seen in a long time, or when I'm parting ways with someone I know I won't see for a while. But it's definitely not a regular occurrence
I mentioned in my other reply that my hiking group hugs when we meet, which started as a joke when the women did, then stuck. Now, when someone new joins you can feel the emotion of missing out when they arrive, and the acceptance when it happens as they leave.
Next time a mixed gender group meets, and the women hug the women and men, etc, start a ridiculous laugh and pretend to hug one of the dudes. If he does, you may have started a trend.
Like, does this mean you are afraid of other people you don't know judging you, or that you or your friends find it socially unacceptable?
Either way that seems to be more of an individual problem rather than a social one. I am physically affectionate with my friends and have never been confronted about it by a member of the public , not that I would really care if I were. People be dumb, I'm not going to let someone else's projected homophobia dictate my friendship.
That it would be viewed as awkward and unwelcome by the other participants. Consent is key, yo
That's a good view. You'd be surprised who is down for a hug, though.
My friend group usually goes for the handshake hug. This led to things like when someone is having a hard time we hug it out.
We also compliment each other a lot. It's nice. Some of these guys didn't get compliments until our group started doing it to each other. You can watch someone who doesn't get a lot of compliments change their body language from closed off to confident just by letting them know you like their shirt or that their haircut looks great.
Start easy with the handshake back pat. Easing into it can overcome some of the awkwardness that causes people to shy away from physical contact. Not everyone will be down for it, and you're right that consent is key. Maybe it won't work, but you're not out anything by giving it a shot.