Programmer Humor

31992 readers

363 users here now

Post funny things about programming here! (Or just rant about your favourite programming language.)

Rules:

Posts must be relevant to programming, programmers, or computer science.
No NSFW content.
Jokes must be in good taste. No hate speech, bigotry, etc.

founded 5 years ago

MODERATORS

AgreeableLandscape@lemmy.ml

cat_programmer@lemmy.ml

744

Code quality can be measured in fucks per minute (sopuli.xyz)

submitted 5 months ago by hydroptic@sopuli.xyz to c/programmerhumor@lemmy.ml

30 comments fedilink hide all child comments

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de 32 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

Just say your profanities aloud and don't let them make it to version control.

In the first major software system I designed and helped build I was a little too open in my comments. For years after that software had entered sunset I'd still get Slack pings along the lines of: "This looks like a Maximum Derek comment: ..." They were all diatribes about whatever was giving me grief when I was writing the code and they would all look perfectly at home in the script for 48 Hours (minus the racial or sexuality slurs).

In my defense we were working with PHP 5.3 at the time.

[–] hydroptic@sopuli.xyz 17 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

I grew up in a bit of a sketchy neighborhood and up until my mid 20's all my jobs were the sort where everybody cursed a lot, plus Finns tend to curse a lot in general.

I absolutely have not kept my cursing out of repositories, although looking at my last work project which had about 33000 lines all in all (maybe 2/3 written by me) when including comments, I was surprised to find it only 4 had "shits" and 6 "fucks". One line in an example & test file had both:

	zap.NewExample().Sugar().Errorw("welp, shit's fucked",
		"IsBadRequest", IsBadRequest(err),
		Field(err))

and then there's some comments like

// - turn the unsafe.Pointer into a *[8]byte, allowed due to unsafe pointer fuckery

// FIXME: this is just to make cli tool usage easier. It's a horrible fucking hack and should be
//  nuked from orbit

// FIXME: get rid of all this gorilla legacy bullshit. Could start by getting rid of the needless
// Interface type

[–] Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 5 months ago

Yeah, that's the kind of thing I did only more often. Plus it was back when the conventional wisdom was that 50% of source code should be comments. So there was a LOT.

[–] flashgnash@lemm.ee 5 points 5 months ago

Honestly I would love to work on a codebase full of profanity, let me know I'm not alone in my anger towards an inanimate object

Also would help make it feel less corporate

[–] Potatos_are_not_friends@lemmy.world 8 points 5 months ago

Ah PHP 5.3... totally understandable.