this post was submitted on 11 Jul 2023
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Hey, just thanks for acknowledging this. Bothers me so much.
To be honest, when I was a mildly-homophobic 8 year old, the “they can do what they like in the privacy of their own homes but keep it away from public view” type, flinging insults didn’t do anything to alienate gay people from empathy. Using “gay” as an insult and saying the f-slur would actually turn me away from you and to look at LGBTQ+ with more sympathy.
I’m guessing most people don’t work like that, though. I would like to figure out how we can have most people turn off that part of their brain, that’s susceptible to the name calling, and only responds to peoples’ views. Aside from that complete disconnect in understanding an experience where insults might alienate people from my empathy and helping sway neutrals over to pseudo-allies, understanding how that happens, thanks for explaining, it was pretty helpful. I appreciate it 😊
For the homophobic insult thing, just want to point out we still do it.
Stuff like saying "Trump is Putin's bitch" or using pictures of them kissing to gross people out for instance. The insult purpose is to alternate you from Trump not from gay people, but it can also do that, and it taps into a knee jerk revulsion to effect those with that specific disgust response.
This isn't about personally susceptiblity to bigotry. It's about what the words are doing and achieving socially. There are different things that effect everyone on this level. The aggragate impact is what is relavent.