whyrat

A lot of negative comments. I went through a divorce last year (male, mid 40s), and used dating apps when I was ready to start meeting people. I was apprehensive going in but ended up shocked by how positive the results were. After a week or two I would have several matches and pause searching while I talked with those and planned in-person meetings. Most profiles you'll never get a reply. Of those you match again, half likely never respond to initial introductions / questions. But, if you live in a major metro area there's still plenty of people looking for relationships if you're willing to filter through that. I'm now happily in a relationship for the past few months so I've stopped using these apps.

I tried 3: eHarmony, hinge, and bumble. Here's my feedback from best to worse.

Hinge: encourages discussion as an initial match prompt. I met the most people on this app and many matches led to in person dates. Met the person I'm currently dating seriously on here.

Bumble: costs money to send a comment / question, free to "just swipe". Kept showing me profiles for people currently within my search distance, but who have listed another major city as their home (I guess they're connecting through the airport and on the app?). Went on multiple dates with matches, fewer than hinge.

eHarmony: where I originally met my previous wife ~20 years ago. Now had the fewest matches and worst experience (and highest cost). I stopped checking this one after about a month. Went on only 1 date.

Feedback from my matches about the app: many men are using it to find people to cheat with / aren't serious about a relationship. All of them told me actually holding a conversation on the app put me in the "top tier" of their matches. Many shared that matches just gave super short answers then asked for a phone number. Several noted that half the time they shared a number they almost immediately received dick pics. Multiple said matches tried to get them into crypto (?!?!).

For me (busy work schedule, and still spend half my time with kids) the experience was far better than any dates friends or co workers suggested. The profiles are not super deep... Yes everyone loves live music, travel, and The Office. I wanted to connect over something more specific than that. At least the people you match with are also looking for a relationship. Meeting people through my hobbies at 40+ most are in long term relationships or not interested in starting one. The apps are largely superficial... Half the first dates I went on one or both of us decided not to have a second date. Which is honestly expected... Even after filtering through the profiles and messaging in app you still only know the basics for most people.

For you specifically: many matches took issue with the recent timing of my divorce. If you're separated (not divorced) expect that to be a deal breaker for many.

Even if they do; if your employer "provides" the insurance they'll take a cut of any cost savings :(

No need for a meme. Just say happy mother's day. A personal anecdote will mean more... Give one example of why you think they're a great mother.

I have a few close friends who are mothers I sent a note today. If you're close enough you'd wish them a happy birthday it'd be kind to do the same on any other holiday that applies. And ultimately this is all about being nice to people you care about. If it would make their day a little bit better: do it!

The same applies for days that aren't holidays too ... This is part of how you make and maintain friendships. Send a nice message every once in a while just to let them know they matter to you and you think highly about them. People love to hear others appreciate them. They're more likely to do the same back if you do, and I always find it uplifting to get a random compliment from a friend.

There's already an annual child tax credit: https://taxpolicycenter.org/briefing-book/what-child-tax-credit

I'm sure they didn't even check if birth rates are influenced by this...

Music videos! Binging some of the live sessions posted by artists is a healthier time sink than most everything else on YouTube.

Celery salt is made from celery seed and salt. It's not as salty as table salt: https://www.allrecipes.com/article/what-is-celery-salt/

Mid 40s. I feel older than I used to; but can still do everything I love so I'd not consider myself "old".

If you're looking for convincing arguments; read through the responses from this panel of experts: https://www.kentclarkcenter.org/surveys/tariffs/ (from 2024) and more recently: https://www.kentclarkcenter.org/surveys/tariffs-reciprocal-and-retaliatory-2/

Many of the responding professors provide detail on why they vote a certain way. For example to the 3rd part of the question from 2024: "The gains for the American economy from tripling the tariffs would measurably outweigh the losses." you get replies like:

Protectionism via tariffs creates well-understood aggregate losses in efficiency. This is so even if China "unfairly" subsidizes its steel. Political motivations aside, actual distributional impacts are modest, ill targeted, and better handled with other more direct tax tools.

With links to further background information: https://economics.mit.edu/sites/default/files/publications/CW%2004-15-22.pdf & http://www.econ.ucla.edu/pfajgelbaum/tradewar_1203.pdf with more detail to read.

Not sure if this will convince you or not; but it's at least a cache of relevant information.

British band "Jungle" has been in heavy rotation for me the past ~6 months. Specifically watch their music videos and the dance choreography. I suggest playing the entire album "Volcano" as one video.

It's overvalued in my market at the moment, (Dallas) majority of properties sitting on the market for over half a year and making several list price reductions. COVID inflated the market a bit too much and it needs to come down... 10-20% would be a fair amount I'd expect it to drop over 2 years.

But there are a lot of external factors I'm not considering in my estimate: like idiotic tariffs, incompetent leadership at the state level, and a possible demographic shift depending on how people react to immigration reductions (and possibly net emmigration)... I give a significant chance something out of left field will upend the economy 🤷‍♂️. But who knows when the people in charge change their policies every other day and then insist their new opinion has always been their super secret plan all along...

Housing prices are sticky to go down because they're also an investment. People (in aggregate) have a tendency to hold rather than sell at a loss. Also note it varies significantly across geographies.

Edit: also houses are not liquid so that also adds to the stickiness of pricing. It takes time for price signals to develop due to the slow (often over a month) & infrequent nature of transactions. It also matters that there's an industry of professionals who benefit from keeping prices higher.

Dave the Diver, but in space?