meep_launcher

Yea, I think it went off the rails as soon as broad generalisations were used as to predict the motives of the sex worker. People go into sex work for many different reasons, and that is an important thing to know when piecing together the advice given.

I think a huge misstep of the original argument is "career politician bad". Biden is seen as a one man "dynasty" because he has ~50 years of experience. Obama and Clinton are only seen as dynasties because they had active First Ladies so there's a "power couple" image.

I think it's fair to say there are political dynasties- the Kennedy's, the Bushes- and it makes sense that they will tend to happen naturally. If my dad was president of the United States, at the age of 12 I'd have a much better understanding of the Washington Political Machine than most people.

Usually when we think of "Outsider" candidates, we think of people who have 0 government experience who enter the arena. Notice that Trump isn't mentioned in the post. Ofc Trump was as embedded in the Washington establishment as much as anyone else when he ran in 2016, having ran for president previously and using the ol' "wine and dine" method generously to help him get a leg up in business.

I personally don't think it's a bad thing to have a ton of experience in getting a lot of people to do one thing together- oddly enough that's an INCREDIBLY HARD THING TO DO. We need all sorts of people in politics in order to represent the people accurately. The Tim Walz's and AOC's in congress brought so much to the table- they know what it's like to grow up as the everyday American. The Biden's and the Pelosi's have been removed from that world for so long it's understandable they might not have the most accurate picture of modern American life, but they do have the deep understanding for how to get things done. In Biden's single term, he has outpaced most presidents in getting legislation passed. I remember being optimistic in 2020 hoping Biden would be a modern LBJ, and by gum I think ol' Joe did it.

If you do this before work, we call it "The Sandman's Gamble"

"I will have you know I'm a self made man, just like my father and his father before him"

And let him have that cake? No way- she should have her cake and eat it too.

I looked it up and a block in Chicago (where I live) is between 100 to 600 meters.

Chicago and New York have similar walkability, at least in my experience.

Nearest Grocery Store is 1.2 km (0.8miles) away from me, I usually take my bike to go shopping

Nearest park is like... 50 feet from me (15meters) but I happen to live right next to a park.

Nearest cornerstore is 300 meters

Nearest train station is 600 meters

Nearest library is 800 meters

To add some more,

Nearest bar is 400 meters away

I'm a musician, within 1km of me there are 4 open mics I can go to

Nearest theater is the Music Box which is 1.2 km away

Nearest baseball stadium is 1 km away

God I love Chicago

So I dealt with this a shit ton in my 20s, and have only recently found an effective way to reframe my mindset.

First, my friend introduced me to parts theory. It's a practice that's underscored by "nonessentialism" for my philosophy friends here (i.e. there is no single you, you are made up of many, many identities that come together). The exercise I would recommend you do is to name the different parts of you. Hell, to make it fun, pretend they are tarot cards or something. For instance my negative feelings came from a part of me I now call "the sleezy politician" who manipulates people into doing what he wants. I also took note of the origin story of this character- I had very unstable family dynamics that had a lot of backroom conversations, and also I had a traumatic friend group explosion in highschool that taught me I need to control others through charm to survive.

I also have "the musician", "the teacher", "the council", "the romantic", "the child"... I listed 34 and I could probably keep going. Recognize each one of these people is trying to take control of the wheel of your life, and you can choose who you give it too.

I also just listened to Kevin Hines on the Man Enough Podcast . The man enough podcast is a podcast that deals with men's issues through a feminist lense- I see it as the antidote to the manosphere. That said, I don't think you need to be a dude to take something from this. TW: it has a lot to do with suicide, but it is very uplifting when it comes to self love. The exercise I took away from it is to note the thoughts repeating in my head of who I tell myself I am, and then say the opposite. I am responsible. I am kind. I am genuine. I am honest. I am enough.

Finally I had a thought yesterday- I need to love myself before I love others. If I'm not comfortable in my own skin, how can I be comfortable with someone else? My friend who just got married said he knew she was the one when "the relaxed feeling I have when I'm alone at home is the same when I'm with her at home. I feel at home." That's when I realized I need to be at home with myself.

But don't just love yourself- have a crush on yourself. Idk about you, but when I'm absolutely crushing on someone I'm seeing, I become like a bird of paradise. I keep my place clean. I exercise. I eat right. I take them out to dance and see the world. I do everything I can to be my best self for this person. So why not do that for me?

I hope some of this can help friend. You aren't just wanted here, you are needed here, and for a reason.

idk, I know that there are great companies to work for- my sister found a unicorn of a job. Great pay (and hourly), tons of vacation, work from home, a decent amount of travel but not too much (she's in sales for a scientific instrument company), but I have job hopped enough to know that what she has is now becoming the exception. And of course to your point, this is all anecdotal. I'm now self employed and I've never been busier nor happier.

I cannot tell you how many bosses Ive had/ heard say they are going to have a moment of "radical kindness" and then proceed to just RIP into their employees until they cry.

Corporate double speak is wack.

They sure do pal.

Wait people have multiple accounts?

So I think I realized I hate myself but didn't realize it. I've been as outwardly focused as I could be for as long as I can remember. I love beeing a shoulder to cry on, to root on my friends as they improve their lives, and creating spaces where people come together to make music (I host weekly jams in Chicago).

But one thing I've noticed is I get really nervous when people start getting close to me. I've tried to have relationships, and pretty soon I just feel a pit of anxiety and things end pretty quick. Even friendships can make me feel nervous. I consider myself super extraverted, and I have no problem addressing large groups, but it's a very small club of people who I actually feel okay being me with.

Recently I realized I'm not in that club. I don't feel comfortable alone, and I thought that was just the extraversion, but I realized it's that I mostly ruminate on every shitty thing I've ever done and feel really bad. If I can't feel comfortable with myself, how can I feel comfortable showing that to anyone else?

My friend just got married, and he said the thing that he felt was the core of it was that he felt as comfortable being at home with his wife as he would being alone. That made me realize I'm not ready for a relationship right now.