this post was submitted on 02 Jan 2024
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Risa

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Star Trek memes and shitposts

Come on'n get your jamaharon on! There are no real rules—just don't break the weather control network.

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[–] JackDark@lemmy.world 66 points 11 months ago (4 children)

Odo has absolutely always returned the cart. In fact, I'd say he's tracked down everyone he can find that hasn't returned the cart and forced them to return one in front of him.

[–] USSBurritoTruck@startrek.website 17 points 11 months ago

Nah, Odo believes in rules and order too much to force others to return their cart when there's no rule saying they need to do so.

He doesn't like it when people leave their carts in random locations, which is why he leaves his very neatly where it's not going to be a danger of rolling into a car or the middle of the lot, but he definitely isn't going to return it himself when it's someone else's job to do so.

[–] Awesome357@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

Also he will arrest Jake and Nog and drag them into detention for Nog's quarter scheme. Quark will feign being outraged but then will insist he be included next time so he can teach Nog how to not get caught.

[–] evdo@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 11 months ago
[–] Sir_Fridge@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Odo just becomes a cart.

[–] ummthatguy@startrek.website 57 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] USSBurritoTruck@startrek.website 28 points 11 months ago (2 children)

While I appreciate the addition, I feel like Weyoun would command Damar to return the cart.

Damar would then drunkenly push it into the cart return and not pick it up when it fell over.

[–] thessnake03@lemmy.world 9 points 11 months ago

At the end, he gets really into the store loyalty program. FOR WALMART!!

[–] marcos@lemmy.world 40 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Nah, Bashir would devise a clever plan to everything work out just fine without people returning their carts.

Also, I'm pretty sure you got Garak wrong. He would promise never to return the cart, make a loud point about it for everybody, and insist on the subject every chance he gets. Just to covertly return it when nobody is looking because when Cardassia befriends the supermarket his people would benefit from the carts being correctly parked.

[–] skydivekingair@lemmy.world 12 points 11 months ago

And then Julian’s plan would cause more chaos than had it not been implemented because one person went ahead and returned their cart.

[–] USSBurritoTruck@startrek.website 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Bashir has no idea how carts end up back at the cart return, and between O’Brien and Garak he isn’t likely to learn.

[–] mosiacmango@lemm.ee 8 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Bashir ended up helping several patrons with cart return based injuries and forgot to return his in the process.

He also invented a cart injury vaccine while helping, but it was shuffled into obscurity by section 31 who had several cart injury assassinations planned.

[–] radix@lemmy.world 36 points 11 months ago (1 children)

O'Brien returned his cart, and yours, and was mumbling complaints about lazy people while gathering two more when somebody drove a motorized cart into him and broke his ankle.

[–] ummthatguy@startrek.website 15 points 11 months ago

Feral Molly to little Molly: "Remember to push the cart just as he looks away."

[–] hakunawazo@lemmy.world 22 points 11 months ago
[–] linux2647@lemmy.sdf.org 22 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Kai Winn: grabs you by the ear and declares that the prophets dictate you not only return her cart for her, but that you must unload her cart into her vehicle. And if you don’t, your pah will suffer, my child

[–] user1234@lemmynsfw.com 5 points 11 months ago

Nah, Kai Winn is the Karen who complains to the store manager that all of the carts pull to the left.

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 20 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] USSBurritoTruck@startrek.website 14 points 11 months ago (2 children)
[–] ursakhiin@beehaw.org 4 points 11 months ago

Those are the days "I only went in for 1 or 2 (20 as it turns out) things"

[–] MajorHavoc@lemmy.world 16 points 11 months ago

Was reading this to my SO, and was given a correction for Quark: gets Rom to pay Quark for the privilege of returning Quarks cart.

[–] jawa21@startrek.website 15 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] USSBurritoTruck@startrek.website 8 points 11 months ago

“The cart return tasks me! It tasks me and I shall have it!”

[–] alcoholicorn@hexbear.net 10 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Do you know how many carts Dukat spared from getting pushed into traffic?

[–] CrayonMaster@midwest.social 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

But people who don't return carts are just as bad as landlords???

[–] USSBurritoTruck@startrek.website 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Hey, talk to Rom; he's the one who thinks that.

[–] Rom@hexbear.net 5 points 11 months ago

It's true, I do.

[–] SGG@lemmy.world 10 points 11 months ago

Sisko - chance to also perform a warcrime while returning the trolley.

[–] AntiOutsideAktion@hexbear.net 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

The real move is to park next to the cart return

[–] USSBurritoTruck@startrek.website 9 points 11 months ago

Now you're thinking like Vedek Bareil.

[–] Donnagen@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Morn: never seen with a cart

[–] USSBurritoTruck@startrek.website 5 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Morn is the guy whose job it is to collect the carts and stock shelves, but the only thing anyone ever sees him doing is smoking out behind the dumpster.

[–] VindictiveJudge@startrek.website 7 points 11 months ago

And yet, all the carts are collected and all the shelves fully stocked.

[–] PlasmaDistortion@lemm.ee 3 points 11 months ago

But everyone talks about how he’s the best with carts.

[–] VicksVaporBBQrub@sh.itjust.works 5 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Changelings/Founders: "It's a flaw of the solids... To turn something as simple as food transporting - into a fundamental flaw of a decrepit society. Their so-called "cart" -- a mere extension of the hands, solids fail to recognize as part of one's primal nutrition gathering needs in order to just survive. But instead, as logical weapons to other solids who oppose their incomplete transportation rules..."

[–] Awesome357@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

Garak will try to eliminate all carts, for the safety of the alpha quadrant cars.

A couple minor changes to this one:

Obrien: gets imprisoned and tortured while returning cart, gets dumped next to the corral for pickup

Garak: convinces someone else to return the cart. They are happy to do so for such a charming gentleman. Merely a simple tailor, of course.

[–] django@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 11 months ago

You have two wolfs inside of you. One returns the cart, the other does not.