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submitted 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) by illi@lemm.ee to c/reddit@lemmy.world

There was this legendary comment on reddit to a thread asking people what would their plan be if they were immortal and got milion dollars, but there was a superintelligent immortal snail also with milion dollars who would want to kill them. I was trying to find it but as far as I can tell OP removed it. Does anyone here have it and could post it here by any chance?

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[-] em2@lemmy.ml 1 points 9 months ago

You and a super intelligent snail both get 1 million dollars, and you both become immortal, however you die if the snail touches you. It always knows where you are and slowly crawls toward you. What's your plan?

[-] ekky43@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

I believe the question goes:

Would you become immortal and receive a million dollars, if the only thing that could kill you was being touched by an also immortal snail, which constantly moves toward you at a snails pace and cannot be contained or blocked by any means?

Either that, or there existed multiple versions of the question, which isn't unlikely.

[-] rynzcycle@kbin.social 1 points 9 months ago

Here you go, via Wayback Machine.

It's the top comment, which has since been edited.

[-] illi@lemm.ee 1 points 9 months ago

Thanks! Exactly what I was looking for. Don't ise wayback machine much so the option never occured to me.

[-] MonkderZweite@feddit.ch 1 points 9 months ago

Btw, how would a snail, even a super intelligent one, get out of a christmas bauble?

[-] Serdan@lemm.ee 0 points 9 months ago

The material will eventually break down. You're both immortal.

[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 1 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Encase the fucker in granite then put the granite prison into orbit.

[-] MonkderZweite@feddit.ch 0 points 9 months ago
[-] Serdan@lemm.ee 0 points 9 months ago
[-] MonkderZweite@feddit.ch 1 points 9 months ago

Eeh, Kbin wants a login.

[-] x4740N@lemmy.world 1 points 8 months ago

Didn't that story originate from rooster teeth

[-] illi@lemm.ee 1 points 8 months ago

No idea tbh

[-] MonkderZweite@feddit.ch 0 points 9 months ago

Put a glass over the snail. Put a car on top of it. Glass breaks, snail dies by accident.

[-] NegativeLookBehind@kbin.social 1 points 9 months ago

I think one of the stipulations was that it couldn’t be killed

[-] Bonehead@kbin.social 0 points 9 months ago

But it could be detained. So, put glass over snail. Shuffle glass to edge of table with a card to keep the snail in the glass. Turn glass over and seal with several layers of plastic wrap. Place sealed glass in a small safe. Put the small safe in a bigger safe. Pay a deep sea fishing vessel to bring you and the safe to the location of the Mariana Trench. Drop safe from boat into the trench. Have fishermen drop you off in Costa Rica, retire as a hermit living on the beach.

[-] NegativeLookBehind@kbin.social 0 points 9 months ago

As the safe descends into the trench, it implodes.

The snail is now free and seeks its revenge. The snail will taste blood.

[-] x4740N@lemmy.world 1 points 8 months ago

Just don't hire oceangate to make your safe

[-] Bonehead@kbin.social 1 points 9 months ago

Impossible...the safe is made from reinforced steel, not carbon fiber...

[-] ChrisLicht@lemm.ee -1 points 9 months ago

It’s interesting how blithely people consign an immortal super-intelligent being to ostensibly millennia of consciousness, while entombed.

I’m no hippie, but I would probably prefer to be touched by the snail than know I had tortured another intelligent being for many lifetimes.

[-] SatanicNotMessianic@lemmy.ml 3 points 9 months ago

The snail’s not that intelligent. It voted for Trump twice, has a thin blue line punisher sticker on its shell, and thinks immigrants and The Gays (tm) are responsible for its social ills.

this post was submitted on 24 Sep 2023
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