this post was submitted on 31 Mar 2025
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I wonder what went through the mind of that hamster as it sat there for 3 days with its face stuck to the wall. Like that would FUCK UP a human. We made a whole damn movie about the guy who got his hand trapped under a rock that one time.
Ez, it's obviously fake (the hamster would try to move & it's not like you don't notice a magnet stuck to a cage either) but a funny fantasy story, sort of an early boomer-humour.
Considering the little girl brought it in, it's definitely more plausible she wouldn't notice the magnet. And considering the amount of parents who give hamsters as pets and never take any responsibility over it themselves, even more so.
But I'd also assume, with no real insight into the behavior of hamsters, that one in this situation would wind up either tearing it's cheek off (depending on the strength of the magnet) or figuring out it can dislodge / move enough to free it.
A magnet that was strong enough to keep the hamster in place would be applying enough pressure to the flesh between the magnet and cage to destroy the tissue, due to lack of circulation, over 3 days.
If this was even remotely true the hamster would be seriously injured and severely dehydrated, not walking around normally. This isn't even considering the damage that it would do to itself while trying to escape.
It's a fake story
I would assume one would go full speed on the hamster wheel, now with the magnet behaving like a dynamo, & generate so much electricity it would electrocute the family.
The hamster ofc wouldn't stop running & over the next few days build up so much energy it would successfully super sayan way past level 9000 and start moving from world to world just destroying planets for fun.
The safest way to do it would be making a segmented enclosure: night cage with a comfortable resting area and one for use during the day with the wheel and magnet. Also change out the hamster for a ferret. This way, any hazardous charge that builds up will be contained within the ferret day cage.
And the name of that hamster? Pikachu.
Tragically flawed, but still a beautiful story.
HOWEVER, this has inspired me to build a hamster wheel with PEMs around its circumference and surrounded by stator windings so I can get my hamster to charge a battery. I mean, if I had a hamster, I would definitely make this a weekend project. Or I'd at least search for this on YouTube to see who else has already done it with cute results.
How many magnets you think there are that would just be lying under a fridge not stuck to anything, but small enough to fit in a hamsters mouth and powerful enough to hold a hamster in place without even getting to directly contact metal. Let alone that like 99% of hamster cages are plastic.
Two under my fridgs. Fell off memory piece.
Yeah, right. Nothing ever happens.
No you wanna know how fucked up a human can get:
Frank Herbert wrote an entire series of novels about a guy who put his finger in a box and was told "An animal caught in a trap will gnaw its leg off to survive." Then the dude goes on to cause 66 billion deaths and have a son that lives for 7500 years as a giant worm/human hybrid
What, no hamster?