this post was submitted on 16 Dec 2024
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A drop of the guillotine is completely free. Just saying.
Sure. But it just doesn't have the same fire and brimstone "wrath of an angry God" feel to it. Guillotines are quick. But if you really hate someone, you'll go to the trouble of hauling an 800 lb boulder around just to off 'em. If you really want to show your displeasure with someone, you'll go to the trouble of loading a giant rock on a boat and hauling it an hour offshore. It's "I hate you so much I'm willing to go to this amount of effort!"
What about a really dull guillotine?
One that takes ten or fifteen drops to do any real damage?
I mean, yeah, but it just doesn't have the same vibe to it. You can't make a grandiose speech about "condemning them to the depths." Plus it's just much more terrifying, watching the surface of the water rise above you, as you're pulled inexhorably down into the abyss...
Also, the water muffles the screaming!
Don't wanna ruin the fun, but I'd argue a 100lb (to continue the weird measures) boulder would more than suffice.
It's not about efficiency; it's about sending a message! Bullets are a lot easier than boulders into the Sea, but they just don't have the same vibe! Nothing says you hate someone quite as much as being willing to haul a half ton boulder a hundred miles offshore in a boat. The impracticality isn't a bug; it's a feature! For boulders chucked into the ocean, the bigger, the better!
Yeah sure,but....it's 400lbs. I mean, if I did that with every person I hate...oh boy. Strongman in 2 years. World domination in 5. Am I truly ready for this responsibility? Is anyone?
Bring justice to the wicked AND get swole? Sounds like positives all around. You'll basically be Hercules at that point!
But that'll bring a new level of responsibility. I couldn't just be Hercules without trying to rid the world of evil. And I already have plans for the weekend 🤨
I mean, even Hercules is allowed to take a break. In fact, self-care is a vital part of the work of any true hero! You can't be effectively battling evil if you're unhealthy, depressed, or sleep deprived. Take care of yourself, superfam!
But dude. I can't just sit around, drinking superjuice while bad deeds are committed all around. How shall I select? What to prioritize? Whom to save, whom to ignore? I can't do it, this pressure! Can't we just shoot the ceos and be done with it?
Eh, just do your best, and accept imperfection. You're Hercules, not God. Try to do what good you can, when you can. Trying to perfectly optimize things simply leads to madness.
Haha, most excellent comic, didn't know that one. A perfect conclusion good sir. Let me try to counter:
http://i.imgur.com/kCCqI.jpg
Yes, a true classic!