One that comes to mind for me: "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger" is not always true. Maybe even only half the time! Are there any phrases you tend to hear and shake your head at?
this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2024
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Not a fan of "it is what it is". It's called a thought-terminating cliche. It often means "I'm tired of talking about this, do it my way" when my boss says it.
I've always liked it. I guess it depends who is saying it because when my old boss said it, it meant more like, "this is the situation we're in, let's not waste time arguing about why it is the situation and let's just focus on dealing with it and going forward"
Yeah it can have wildly different meanings depending on the circumstances in which it's said. It can be "well we can't change it, may as well get on with life" all the way to "well this discussion is not gonna change anything, let's get on with fixing it". Very similar, but polar opposite sentiments.
On the rare occasions that I’ve dragged out “it is what it is”, I’ve really wanted to say something like neither of us can change it, and instead of working towards a solution, all you’ve done is COMPLAIN for the last hour. Now SHUT UP, accept the situation, and make yourself useful!
Those sentiments seem identical to me.
First one is saying there's no point fixing anything, just get over it. Second one saying fixing it might suck, let's fix it anyway.
Very, very different...
Oh? They both read to me as "We can't change the past, only the future".
I personally would only use the original phrase to imply what you're saying. This is why context matters so much I think; some people just use it as a thought terminating cliche, I'm afraid.
Oedipus begs to differ.
You bring an interesting point! So there's a Japanese phrase this reminds me of: Shouganai (しょうがない) which translates to "It can't be helped". For me, this hits differently than "It is what it is". Perhaps it's the context, as I know it's said about natural disasters like tsunamis and therefore has a connotation of the "getting on with fixing it" like you said.
Sure, not everything needs to be picked apart in detail. But, I never use the phrase myself. As someone else ITT pointed out, context matters, too.
I tend to say things like, "we should fix it now, worry about blame later". Or something along those lines.
,I feel like this one is context dependent. Sometimes it's just acceptance of the situation.
"Wish it weren't so hot outside, but this is Texas in August. It is what it is."
Context definitely matters. Your example wouldn't bother me.
Some people seem to think it's a mic drop in other contexts.
An entirely hollow statement, yet somehow ringing with apathy.
Well, it is what it is.
Damn. I was going to say that.
Ah well, es lo que es.
Dos eck eeeees
The basic law of Cologne:
§1: Et es wie et es. („It is how it is.“) Look the facts in the eye, you can't change them.
$2: Et kütt wie et kütt. („It'll come as it comes.“) Accept the inevitable, you can't change fate.
§3: Et hätt noch emmer joot jejange. („Everything turned out fine in the past.“) What turned out okay yesterday, will still work tomorrow. Situationally: We know it's shit, but it's the best we can do with what we have.
§4: Wat fott es, es fott. („What's gone is gone.“) Don't cling to the past.
§5: Et bliev nix wie et wor. („Nothing ever stays the same.“) Be open to new developments.
I use it for things that can be talked about for ages, but nothing can be changed about them. I don't use it to terminate discussion, but more of a well understood quick hand for acceptance and sometimes resignation.
"Agree to disagree" is even worse, especially since often the thing you're arguing about is an empirical goddamn fact and they are not entitled to "disagree" about it. That's not having a difference of opinion; that's just fucking being wrong!
I use it when people keep complaining about situations they cannot change. Yes, we fell in the hole, yes it hurt, please just let's focus on how to get out.
"Ah fuck, this hole sucks! Who even dug that here!? My shoes are dirty, my pants are a mess!" ....
"Well.. It is what it is. Let's get out."
It’s what it’s
I like it. It's premise is accepting things beyond your control, allowing someone to stoically move forward rather than dwell in anxiety and disbelief.
Ooo I get that one, but kinda the opposite way. I tell someone it has to be done this way, or to a certain standard, for it to be right. They don't want to, so they respond with that nonsense.
I agree, when it’s used as a thought-terminating cliché. It’s also very applicable to impart acceptance of something that you can’t control.
I used it today to communicate my feelings on a topic I can't control. Like, me venting isnt going to improve my or the questioners situation.
In principal I am against thought-termination. Sometimes, like a good dog, you gotta put a thought out of its misery
I use it more in acceptance, like if I’m late for work and I hit traffic. Short of driving up the shoulder like an asshole, I’m going to be late. So rather than be stressed for the rest of my commute, I just accept that I’ll be late. It is what it is.
It do be like that
Tautology is tautology, as I say.
The first rule of the tautology club…
It's good for when talking about things beyond your control. They way your boss is using it is bullshit. In that case, it is what he's choosing to decide it is.
Interesting. I use it to indicate I may not like a situation, but I have to play the have I was dealt to the best of my ability, and sometimes... Well to quote lyrics, "got to know when to hold cem, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away, know when to run."
Titties what titties. Why did I think this would be funny