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this post was submitted on 13 Aug 2023
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Asklemmy
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I dont work at weddings, but is a given that the more expensive the wedding is, the shorter the marriage might be.
A big huge expensive wedding is a outbox stress, a vanity display and usually the bride is one of those who want the dream perfect wedding they wanted since she was a child.
Then comes the hyper fixation with aesthetics, that might translate into controlling and micro managing everyone on the wedding party and pushing people away for not matching it.
In the end, nothing about the wedding is about the love, being together, etc. It is just a huge waste of money just for some perfectly curated pictures. The marriage itself is no longer relevant and the couple might not last more than 2 years. Just keep it simple people, or even better, just elope.
There is definitely statistical proof of this. But I would state it as a percentage of income. I have been to lavish weddings that were not an economic inconvenience for the couple.
Yeah, possibly the most expensive wedding I've been to was one where they (rather, the parents) could afford it. And it was lovely
it was first and foremost a party for friends. No dress code, great food, and the only "micromanaging" by bride and groom was to make sure guests were enjoying themselves/remind us that the bar was open. Vows weren't even a part of the wedding (small, family-only).
My wife and I had a moderately large wedding, but it was motivated mostly by her parents. My point is that there may be other reasons that it's a big wedding. We've been together 23 years so I think things are going okay.
Same, but only been together 17 years.
So have a dead cheap wedding and the marriage will last forever?
what does 'a hard row to hoe' mean
Its not that - throwing out a wedding party on a cheap, doesn't really change anything. You and your partner wanting just the two of you and the closest people to be there, and the rest doesn't really matter - that's the core and some sort of indications that you are with right person. The more you are wanting/needing to be there for show, the more it says about your relationship in not exactly positive way.
Don't get me wrong - if you always pictured yourself getting to the venue on an elephant surrounded by royal guards with fireworks in the background and you can afford it - good on you, go for it.
But later in life you might realized that the most important thing was not all the extra stuff, but you and your beloved. Nothing can compensate for that.
Also people taking loans and letting their families sponsor the excessive wedding to me is a bit silly. If you can't afford it, don't do it like that. This money can better spent on holidays or as a down payment for your first house. Its just one night ffs 😁
Basically lol
So that's why all those Vegas weddings last a lifetime makes sense
I was once invited to such a wedding. A show to remember. Must have easily cost $30000. The marriage didn’t last a year.