Asklemmy

Just adding a comment so people will believe me when I tell them I was here when the "3 days without pooping" post happened :)

Good luck on your journey, OP!

Ok i avoided replying to this for long enough. Based on your requirements, I'm making the following recommendations:

• Nutrient-rich meal replacement bars: These bars are designed to provide a balanced mix of macronutrients (carbohydrates, protein, and fat) and essential vitamins and minerals. They are often fortified to meet nutritional needs, making them a convenient and space-saving option. However, they should not be relied upon as the sole source of nutrition for an extended period of time.

• Dried fruits and nuts: Dried fruits are a concentrated source of natural sugars, fiber, and some essential nutrients. They provide energy and can help satisfy hunger. Nuts, on the other hand, are a good source of healthy fats, protein, and fiber. They offer satiety and provide a range of beneficial nutrients.

• Jerky: Jerky, typically made from lean meats, is a good source of protein and can provide energy. It is compact, lightweight, and doesn't require refrigeration. Be mindful of the sodium content.

• Meal replacement shakes: These shakes are formulated to provide a balance of macronutrients and essential micronutrients. They often contain protein, carbohydrates, healthy fats, and a blend of vitamins and minerals. They are easy to consume and require minimal preparation.

• Energy gels: Energy gels are designed to provide quick energy in the form of simple carbohydrates. They are often used by athletes during intense physical activities. While they offer a rapid energy boost, they do not provide substantial nutrients beyond carbohydrates.

I was here

I regularly do this on backpacking trips.

Don't ask me how, I don't even know. I call it Camping Constipation Mode. I usually leave on a Thursday afternoon and get home Sunday night without feeling the urge to shit. And I eat as normally as you can when backpacking, I guess. Seems like most of the dehy food should make you thread a needle at 10 paces but doesn't seem to affect me that way.

Sunflower seeds

Can you tell us when you're done? This is already one of the most interesting posts on lemmy

Oh my God, I have so many questions.

Get anti diarrhea medicine, have electrolyte drinks in moderation.

Everything about this is fantastic. This level of shitposting is exactly what the fediverse needs

High protein, low fiber diet.

It's a real thing, pilots of U2 spy planes that needed to fly for ~18 hours straight without any possibility of pooping, needed to be on a special diet for a few days before a mission.

What exactly it consisted of I don't know, but this is the internet, so I'm sure it can be found. I suspect mainly beef. Maybe jerky?

This is the shit posting I like to see

#thepooppost

I think there's one important question we haven't covered yet. Do you also need to limit the amount you fart?

Because that could affect food choice. Or is that not a factor and you'll be able to discretely let loose somewhere?

someone should create a badge to mark this special occasion. "I was here for the famous poop post of 2023"

Just take the dildo out for 5 minutes man, it's no big deal

You’re gonna be on a sub right?

I didn't see this answer, so sorry if it's been said, but just don't eat. It's three days, after all. Incidentally I've read that if you ate solely what your body needed to survive, it would take 20-40 days to even build up enough waste to have to poop.

I'm going to tell my descendents this was the origin of the phrase "I shit you not"

I just want to be a part of this history. Also maybe like protein shakes?

I just want to say that this post is awesome. Also Military MREs, come in a convenient form factor and had the effect of keeping me well fed and also completely blocked up during whole field exercises.

OP, the answer is obviously to starve yourself and use a buttplug

I was here lmao. Starting to love lemmy

This is one of those threads that’s going go be legendary is it? Like the eating their own foot on early Reddit

You're putting so much effort to avoid pooping... but you should put the same effort into making sure that once this whole thing is over, there's a toilet you can sit on for a few hours without being interrupted. If I was you, I'd choose one in advance and call there for a reservation.

What I would do in this situation would be a 4-day fast. It's not for everybody, but you might want to at least consider it, because it's definitely doable, and some people even claim it's healthy (disclaimer: I am not a medical professional, don't take medical advice from random people on the internet).

To prepare, I would suggest switching to OMAD (one meal a day - effectively you will be fasting 23h every day) up until the trip. OMAD will help your body adjust to long periods of not eating. To be successful with OMAD, you need to ensure that your single meal will cover your daily calorie and nutrient needs. There's a bunch of resources about it online if you search.

Eat your last meal 48h before the trip - this will give you a chance to empty your bowels before you leave. Every day, make sure you drink enough electrolytes + take multivitamins. On the final day of your trip, it should be safe to have a SMALL meal (do not overdo it, you can hurt yourself by eating too much after a fast) - it should take your body over a full day before you'll need to poop.

How long do you have to prepare? Personally, when I first started doing OMAD, it took me over a month before my body became adjusted to fasting. But now, it just feels completely natural.

You're gonna need a bigger knife

Leaving a comment to be part of Lemmy history.

An uncle died for not pooping for 3 days

Op is gonna meet their stinky penpal in person and wants to save a special gift for when they get together, how romantic 😍