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The original was posted on /r/hfy by /u/KyleKKent on 2024-12-03 23:47:44+00:00.
(My train of thought outright crashed at 1900 words. That’s falling on your face and getting a concussion in spitting range of the finish line. Good lord.)
The Buzz on The Spin
“We’ve spoken enough.” She suddenly says rising up. Harold doesn’t bother to rise.
“Have we?” He asks.
“We have. You have made your case, and an admittedly good one. But my authority only extends so far. Convincing me further serves neither of us, so I’m kicking this up the ladder with the highest priority. No doubt it will take them time to debate, but we WILL be seeing you again.”
“And if I slip out of sight when you need me, use THIS contact code. It will get you in touch with my brother, he has the ear of Admiral Cistern who in turn has the ear of many, many powerful individuals.” Harold says holding up his communicator. She brings out her own and they tap. “They didn’t need to be quite that close.”
“I like to be certain.”
“Certain is a good thing to be.” He agrees before smirking. “But you know, you never gave me your name. I am Harold Armoury Jameson of The Undaunted. What beyond unknown alien species blah blah blah would you like to be known as?”
She pauses then smirks.
“You really think I’m giving you my real name?”
“A private nickname. Surely something you’d rather hear me say beyond YOU and HEY isn’t unreasonable.”
“...Velocity. One of my names is Velocity.” She admits and he toasts her with his glass of water.
“To you then Velocity. May your entreaties to your superiors be successful.” He says and she smirks before picking up her own glass for the first time and clinking them together.
“May they be successful indeed.” She says before putting the water down, then vanishing in a recall teleport.
“So she knows about that bit of human culture, or her own people have something similar. Either way, interesting.” Harold notes before signalling for a waitress so he can get the leftovers to go.
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“While I can see the appeal of your religion ma’am, I think I’ve seen enough for now. Unless there’s some other great mystery or truth you’d like to tell me of.”
“Hmm, a pity. But the message doesn’t reach all, not always. In the end though, truth will out. Although, you are heading to speak to The Order of Everbrith next right?”
“We are...” Observer Wu hedges, unsure where she’s going.
“Oh nothing to worry about, just let her know that I’ve given her the privilege into explaining The Cycle of Gravid Resurgence.”
“And that is?”
“Ah ah ah! I’m letting them have the pleasure. Anything more on the Orthodox Gravid Faith? You’re free to spend time in our church of course, but I do need to get back to brushing up on tonight's sermon.”
“How often do you have them?”
“Thrice weekly, and thrice on those days. It accommodates all the differing schedules of work, travel, and of course special sleeping patterns. Not perfectly of course, but well enough that there is maybe only one or two calls for a special service outside of normal hours.”
“Well, that’s good to hear you have it so well thought out.” Observer Wu says before smiling gently. “May I assume that this Gravid Resurgence is a game changer?’
Ah ah! I’m leaving it for her. After all The Conservative Gravids and The Order of Everbirth both will want to have their say.”
“What’s the difference between the two?”
“Well, The Order of Everbirth is mostly about sheer number of children. And The Conservative Gravids are more focused on the role of the husband. How he is to be protected, loved and kept safe. They might give you some trouble.”
“... I thought they were the same denomination with two names?” Patras asks.
“They’re close. Very close and there’s a lot of crossover. But they’re technically different. They do use the same temple though, they just rotate days as to who’s praying or preaching at the time.”
“Which leads to a good question, what do Gravids pray to exactly? Is there a god or is it just some form of meditation upon The Gravid Truth?”
“That depends entirely upon the denomination. The Gravid Faith was born in the wake of... no, I’ll leave the pleasure to Mother Clapperclaw or Mother Arfallen. Perhaps both if you’re lucky. They’re wonderful women. Granted Clapperclaw is likely to want you boys all safe and comfortable, whereas Arfallen rarely goes five minutes without gushing about her little girls. It’s cute.” She says.
“That... oh my goodness, for some reason I’ve spoken to two high priestesses without learning their names. How did I even DO that?” Observer Wu demands.
“Her name is Mother Shanks. Earlier you spoke to Mother Cyberblade.” Harold calls out from the entrance before walking in. “And speaking of, greetings Mother Shanks! A pleasure to meet you.”
“The pleasure is mine young man. Although I must ask, with four men with so small an escort rising to five things aren’t looking quite so good for you if you seek to speak to Mother Clapperclaw and Mother Arfallen. The might try to detain you for your own safety.”
“The lovely ladies of the group are my wives actually. So we have four unattached men. One is station staff, so I assume he can slip out. Even without his gifts of stealth, Observer Wu is married though his beloved is back on the homeworld. I cannot speak for his bodyguards though.”
“I suppose two unattached men surrounded by friends and family is a lot easier for them to swallow. Although I do suggest you get at least a few more women to act as escort. Either way though, you’re safe in this section, so I have little, if anything to complain about. Best of luck now!” Mother Shanks bids them. It’s a clear dismissal, but it’s delivered in such a cheerful tone that it feels odd.
“So did things to well with our infiltrator?”
“Are we getting a new sister wife?” Giria teases.
“Yes and maybe. She’s going to speak to her higher ups to try and get them to calm down, or at least talk to The Undaunted. And I do think I made a good impression on her. I got a name out of her willingly, which means she’s very comfortable around me for an infiltrator. So who knows.”
“I wonder if his dick in her would still be visible.” Umah considers and most of the group misses a step at the sheer what the fuckery of the statement as Harold chuckles.
“Well let me keep working at it and we might very well find out.” Harold says.
“Heh. Hmm... any hatchlings from that... I wonder if it’s possible to breed in naturally invisible Warforms? It so rarely holds true with Cloaken being brought in, would this new species be the secret sauce?” Umah considers
“Maybe. I don’t think right now is the right time to consider Eugenics though. First we need to make sure they’re something other than hostile and hiding.” Obsever Wu remarks.
“It’s not Eugenics, it’s about bringing in the best of the best to the bloodline so we get the strognest possible warriors born!” Umah protests.
“That’s Eugenics.”
“Isn’t that more stopping the ‘wrong’ people from breeding than encouraging the right ones to breed?” Umah asks.
“Partially.”
“Yeah, no. We need computer programmers and farmers and other boring things to get to the exciting job of fighting. I know that, I’m not dumb. Duh.” Umah says as they leave the church entirely and Patras points down the way to the shared Conservative and Everbirth Temple.
“I suppose that was the major mistake of... hmm... bit of a hot button that topic.”
“Heh, so you’re saying the Nazi’s...” Harold begins.
“Don’t start.” Observer Wu warns.
“I’m just saying that if they were more, this group should be in charge over this group should be the only one, then they’d probably not be so reviled.”
“We’re missing something.” Patras notes.
“About a century ago there was a major conflict. The losing side did some pretty heinous things and have been thoroughly vilified by history. What I’m saying is that if they were less horrible they would not be so vilified. They’d still have been wrong mind you. But they’d be less despised.”
“Be that as it may, they are still thoroughly despised and for good reason and you are going to stop this Mister Jameson.”
“Fine, fine. It is a provocative topic, even if the history surrounding them is actually quite fascinating and glossed over so often for pursuit of decrying their leaders as evil and the people as fools if they’re not monsters for failing to oppose it.”
“Mister Jameson. Stop.” Observer Wu commands him. He puts up his hands in surrender. “Good.”
Umah sidles up besides Harold. She leans in to whisper. “What’s so bad about these guys?”
“Death camps, broken treaties, horrible experimentation and more. They basically went down a checklist on how to be hated and reviled by history.” Harold whispers back.
“Oh, and what’s so fascinating about them?”
“The average one was just some average person. Which says all sorts of horrible things about psychology, couple that to the fact that they did make legitimate advances in medicine that no one wants to admit and the sheer raving mess that was the build up to them and you have a drama among dramas, except it was real...”
“How crazy did it get?”
“We have video of one of their most well known leaders twitching and fidgeting in public in a way that suggests he’s on high grade narcotics and stimulants.”
“Whoa... must have been a weird time.” Umah says.
“That’s one way of putting it.” Harold says. “People are also really touchy on the subj...
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