Do not let her dorito hands touch your dick! Don’t let em!
this post was submitted on 13 Nov 2024
795 points (99.3% liked)
Lemmy Shitpost
27166 readers
3178 users here now
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
The penis would be fine, it's the controller that matters
Doritos hands touch my dick all the time...
Do you happen to moderate any discord servers by chance?
Only the important ones.
Just lick it off.
Exactly. I can wash my dick. If cheeto dust gets inside that analog stick it's not ever coming out
Just lick it off.
Agreed. But that doesn't work with the analog stick
Lick my fucking controller? Eugh! Who knows what kinda germs are on that thing. At least licking a penis is actually fun.
That just gives her a dorito flavoured dick to enjoy!
It's ok if she uses chopsticks!
We need c/sounding
Keep your dick beaters off of me!
Yes, the small particles hurt like hell like low power bee stings...or so I have been told
Imma be the weird one: I use my tongue when I eat chips. I get a bowl, I fill it with cips, and then I stick my tongue like a frog onto one at a time, and it sticks a little bit, enough for me to bring it in and eat it.
It’s weird but my hands are always squeaky clean so idgaf
Do you make the mlem noise
I do
Loudly
Asking the real questions
Same, but with popcorn
I use chopsticks with popcorn
This is the way.
Yup I do the same thing with popcorn... At least when I get the popcorn initially from concessions.
Chopsticks. Use them. It takes a little practice, but they are perfect for snacking, especially popcorn. Cheetos are easiest of the chips, but others are possible. No more residue on your finger tips, or the backs of your hands from reaching into the bag. I also switched to chopsticks for things like salads (fruit or vege variety), noodles, and getting olives and such out of jars. Even a good stew or chili can be eaten with chopsticks and a spoon. Now I just need to get better at using chopsticks with my nondominant hand.
Finally a fellow chopstick ninja. I knew I wasn't the only one!
Fellow chopstick master checking in. I've been told by a TON of expats that I could make a decent amount of money just eating as an extra in Japanese/Korean/Chinese television/film. I might have considered it in my 20s, but not now that I'm almost retired.
Is that why all the background actors eating with chopsticks are suspiciously young?
Could be. I think they may have been willing to offer me a premium because I'm shockingly white, with blue/green eyes, and had blonde hair at the time. My dad just taught us all how to use chopsticks as kids, and I spent a semester in college eating everything with them, mainly so that I could.
Edit: oh, and I'm left handed, which is considered lucky in those cultures, from what I've been told.
I use a fork to eat cheesedoodles. They are perfectly porous for the fork to pierce Adhd stick
Seconding chopsticks, they're a little tricky to use but you get used to them with practice. It's nice to not have gross hands after snacking.
Or you can also go the whole I'm a gross monster route and just shake the bag into your mouth, I'm certainly guilty of that.
And I guess if you really don't wanna put in the chopsticks practice time you could get those "trainer" ones for kids that are essentially tongs.
Not gonna look too sophisticated with em at a restaurant but they work well enough for snacks at home. I've been using chopsticks for awhile so I can't remember how long it took to feel proficient, but I'm always for lazier alternatives 👍
Hehe, no offense to my gf, but yea, it do be like that.
When drag was growing up, all of the siblings had assigned controllers. Drag made sure of that. The little ones got to touch their own greasy filth, and drag's was nice and clean. If drag had to touch a sibling's controller, drag needed to wash drag's claws or it wouldn't feel right.