I literally just got promoted 5 months ago with a massive raise and I have dreams at least once a week that my boss hates me and wants to fire me. Why is my brain broken?
this post was submitted on 26 Mar 2024
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Because, regrettably, you're not a cat.
Ugh, devastating. I wish I was a cat.
Right about meow?
Don't we all?
One of my cats is the opposite of this. He's so awkward and never seems to understand or enjoy being a cat. He'll sometimes try and do cat things, spend 10 minutes awkwardly bumping into shit, then give up and go yowl about it on the other side of the unit. Even simple stuff like laying down in a box
Maybe your cat has Garfield-Syndrome. Have you tried feeding it lasagna?
Y'know what, you may be on to something. He does weigh 20 pounds and looks like this:
There's two!
Eeeeeeeeeeeee
Poor guy... Still, cat arrogance is pretty much peak, I'm sure he's confident that other cats are as cat inept as him, maybe more so!
It's true, both of my cats are super confident in their abilities as a cat. One of them even shits without covering her poo, which I recently learned was a dominance thing.
Cats are Beholders. This answers so many questions.
When I was told I was getting a promotion at the end of last year, my manager said it in such a way that he seemed surprised, even as the one giving it to me.
"We're changing your title to . I guess that's, technically, a promotion. Your salary will now be $. Congratulations."
It definitely didn't leave me with the feeling that my manager was happy with me or my work.
It definitely didn't leave me with the feeling that my manager was happy with me or my work.
Exactly how he wanted it. A worker uncertain of their skill or value is much more likely to do whatever they want, and at a lower salary.
Or maybe that is how he actually felt for some reason.
Either they disapproved their role change. F.e they thought OP was an ace welder, but now they got a role, where they mostly fill out paperwork. "I guess this IS a promotion" - see? Or they thought OP was ace at their job, and now they got sidemoted to an unimportant role, which the manager felt was dead end. "Now you are president of the "unimportant matters with no chance of self improvement department". Or maybe the manager expected, a way bigger promotion, because they felt OP was really fit for the role.
If he is minimally competent as a manager, he phrased it, to warn OP that THIS is the time to jump ship.
It wasn't a role change, just a salary rung. I went from information-worker 2 to information-worker II. My day to day responsibilities didn't change.
It's almost like he begrudgingly admitted my skills advanced to the point where the company had to give me the promotion.
Or he felt, you deserved an ACTUAL promotion, rather than a small salary bump. If you feel you are doing good work it is hard to imagine all the other people wouldn't feel it.
Or OP will just do the same job with a slightly higher salary and a fancier name to keep him on board.
Oh yeah the promotion that isn't a promotion. That is also a classic one.
Sounds like you failed upwards.
I used to be like this, now idgaf. Take what you can get from your employer and don’t feel bad for a second.
They wouldn’t feel bad about underpaying, in fact they’d love to underpay you. They’ll also fire you without hesitation if it’s profitable to them.
That’s how the game is played, because it is a game to them. To any decently sized company you’re just a drop in the ocean, a disposable cog in the machine.
It isn't about feeling bad about them, it's about bad feelings about yourself. Low self-esteem, learned helplessness, expectations of bad outcomes, identification of bad traits in ourselves we know shouldn't come out at work, amongst others. This isn't even about the often referred to "Imposter Syndrome", though for some this is the truth, it's all about those expectations on ourselves and lack of appropriate communication by bosses and managers.
This is leadership at its most basic.
Ball up all the little insecurities we have at work and merge them with poor communication from people in authority, and you have an anxious and debilitating soup. Sprinkle in financial issues and general uncertainty about life and I think most of us just expect things to go wrong.
So yes, take what you can from an employer. Also try and take time where you can to give back to yourself.
This happened to my father. Dedicated his whole life to one company. Did crazy overtime. Was well liked by the entire staff and management. Received all kinds of accolades. He always wanted to be upper management and was told if he worked hard enough he'd get it. He's retiring in 3 years. He's never been given an upper management job. He goes in and does the bare minimum now.
Day 1851, they still have not realized I have no clue what I am doing...
barely anyone has though so that's why you go unnoticed so easily.
Damn, just reading the comments made me realize this isn't a dream. I really thought that this literally never happens and that you need to fight for any raise.
Well that's what being a worthless blue collar factory schmuck does to you I guess... I have to fight for a raise, they literally never just hand them out, and if I transition to a new job I have to take a gigantic pay cut. Promotions from within don't exist either, they just hire who they need. The difference between white collar and blue collar work is crazy sometimes!
Out of curiosity, is your plant unionized?
It's a somewhat small (yet world renouned) private company. We generally cater to the ultra wealthy with what we manufacture so the money is absolutely here, but no union.
Well stop fighting for a raise and fight for a union fight for you.
Negativity bias is very strong online. Good things do happen
Yeah, to other people.
.... Like the owners son, who hasn't really done anything, ever, and we all keep having to do his work for him.
Incidentally, I work at a manufacturing company where the production crew are all union, but administration are not; so the blue collar guys are guaranteed annual raises, while us worthless white collar schmucks have to fight tooth and nail for every penny.
For every story of a person being given a raise, there a million stories of a person fighting for a raise and being denied.
Even the union jobs those others guys are talking about, you know what the raises are in our new contract? Five cents for the equivalent of three years of full time work.
Don't be fooled by the echo chamber of cushy office jobs that is so prevalent on Lemmy. You hear about these things because almost nobody else here has to work these shitty jobs like we do.
I work in IT, it's technically white collar, but I sure do feel like the digital equivalent of a mine worker some days.
It's pretty well known that the only way to get "promoted" in IT is to find a better paying position at another employer.
Twenty years I've been working in tech, had a few papers published, got a patent.
Still have imposter syndrome.
Beats me. I've been at my current company for almost a decade and never once got bad feedback, but I'm still convinced they only tolerate me and will eventually find a way to cut me off.
No indication, just my broken brain being unable to grasp someone could actually value me, since I have no idea how to do that myself.
Yeah about the same here. I know for certain that I have very good reputation within the company, and just recently got a fancy new title with big increase in salary but still unproductive days like today make me feel extremely shitty and feel just I'm slacking and they'll notice soon
I consider it a healthy level of paranoia. It keeps you watching for the warning signs and prepared for some of the worst outcomes
“There is no such thing as paranoia, only extreme vigilance”
What’s “a raise”?
It's when you put a cushion on someone's chair that effectively makes them sit at an increased height. You've been "raised".
The thing I have a hard time wrapping my brain around is my worth. I've mostly gotten over my imposter syndrome, but getting paid like $30-40 an hour or more, seems like a lot more than I deserve?
IDK. I'm still struggling to find my worth.
I recently was picked up as a tier II support technician (IT), and I'm the only T2 on the team. Technically, everyone who was hired before me was a "T1" (though, they didn't really use that title, since there wasn't a T2).
I finished my probation today, and I still ask my co-workers questions about the stuff we support. Feels weird to ask someone who is "lower" than I am in title, to help me with something.
I think the problem is inflation and stagnant wages. When you get paid a living wage, but a teacher is making peanuts, it feels wrong.
It's not that you are getting paid too much. It's that most people are being paid too little.
This is me, 100%.