this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2024
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One that comes to mind for me: "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger" is not always true. Maybe even only half the time! Are there any phrases you tend to hear and shake your head at?

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[–] lady_maria@lemmy.world 88 points 3 weeks ago (8 children)

"Everything happens for a reason ."

No. Fuck no, and fuck you. I DARE you to say that to the faces of the endless innocent people—many of whom are CHILDREN—who have been murdered, tortured, abused, enslaved, raped, ect.

[–] Jarix@lemmy.world 33 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I hate how people use this but not the phrase itself.

Everything DOES happen for a reason. It's literal, precise, and accurate. Reasons dont need to be mysterious, aloof, or unknowable. They often are because we choose to stop learning but everything does happen for a reason so start looking for better questions

[–] Enkrod@feddit.org 3 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

The reasons just don't necessarily come with any moral take away attached.

Children get bone cancer for purely physical reasons, yes, but there is no plan behind it, nothing that makes the situation better in any way and this is how the phrase is usually being used. It's people saying: "Don't be sad, something good will come of it." to the faces of grieving parents or deathly ill people who have nothing to look forward to but pain.

Religious/spiritual proselytising has completely alienated the phrase from the methodological naturalism it could express.

[–] Jarix@lemmy.world 2 points 3 weeks ago

Children get bone cancer for purely physical reasons, yes, but there is no plan behind it, nothing that makes the situation better in any way and this is how the phrase is usually being used

My exact point. Im glad you agree with me

[–] BallsandBayonets@lemmings.world 16 points 3 weeks ago

All those innocent people being abused usually have a reason behind it too; it's just that the reason is usually corporate greed and a lack of ethics in politics.

[–] elbucho@lemmy.world 14 points 3 weeks ago

I mean, everything does happen for a reason. It's just that most of the time, the reason is "because so-and-so is an asshole". It makes it essentially a useless platitude, but not an untrue one. I definitely take issue with the implication of it, that there's some supreme, all-knowing authority in the universe who has this complicated, labyrinthine plan for everyone that involves massive amounts of suffering. That whole "mysterious plan of God" thing is a way for Christians to take credit for all of the good stuff that happens, while downplaying all of the bad stuff that happens as just "part of God's plan!" It's insidious.

[–] MentalEdge@sopuli.xyz 4 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Second time I'm bringing it up in this thread, but in response to exactly that kind of thinking is why I've adopted "the universe doesn't care, so we have to" as a phrase I try to live by.

There are so many popular ways of thinking that absolve humans and humanity of various kinds of responsibility.

It's not good.

My preferred response to this is, "Entropy. The eventually and unstoppable heat death of the universe where none of this matters is the reason."

[–] tacosanonymous@lemm.ee 3 points 3 weeks ago

Key indicator of privilege right there.

[–] grepe@lemmy.world 2 points 3 weeks ago

I think I get the sentiment that you are angry at but there is nothing wrong with that statement. It just doesn't mean "whelp, there must be some higher purpose those things are serving that we don't see" and is more like "there are some awful people doing bad things" or "they just were living in a seismic area" or "they had some genes not compatible with their survival"... There are always reasons. Not satisfying or purpose fulfilling reasons, just reasons.

[–] Fuzzy_Red_Panda@lemm.ee 2 points 3 weeks ago

I used to say this when I was a cringy 20-year-old, before I really saw and understood the world (and still believed in a god).