Ask Lemmy

Hey! Not sure if anyone's still here, but here's a serious answer:

TL;DR: everyone perceives swear words differently, and swearing can be used for purposes other than to insult someone directly

Swear words serve a purpose in language just like every other word. People, or at least many English speaking people that I've encountered, tend to consider rude language/swearing to be superfluous speech, words that can and in some cases should, be removed from the language. That's a misconception. The point and purpose of swear words is to be taboo and rude. If these words didn't exist, they would likely be substituted by something else, because from a sociolinguistic perspective, our society right now has evolved to need a linguistic way to express the things that are conveyed with swearing, even if it's really bad things like racism, disdain, threats of violence.

Now, one of the interesting things about swear words and rude language in general is that everyone perceives these words with a different severity. Some people feel comfortable with saying "cunt" for one reason or another. For example, Australian and British English speakers tend to be more comfortable with that word than American English speakers. For other people, even minced oaths can be considered rude, such as saying "darn" instead of "damn" or "fiddlesticks" instead of "fuck". It could also have to do with background or identity, like women calling each other "bitch" can be considered less severe than a man calling a woman a "bitch". Or someone who's deeply religious could object to the use of "hell" while someone who isn't might not even consider it rude.

Lets get back to the purpose of swearing. Swearing can have many different uses, such as showing you're part of an in group. Imagine a group of women working in a auto body shop together for example. In order to signal to each other that they're comfortable around each other, they might refer to each other as their "bitches". But that doesn't mean that a customer can come in and say "hey bitch I need new headlights": they're not part of the group, they haven't earned that privilege. Swearing is also a rite of passage. Adults get to swear, but we consider a sign of a good upbringing in the English speaking world as a child that does not swear. Throughout all these uses, there's a through line of flaunting social expectations. Swearing can be used to damage and berate and humiliate, of course, but a lot of swearing is done with subtext. "Hey, you're my friend, this is a relaxed environment, of course you're not going to think when I say a rude word that I'm insulting you" or "I'm feeling such a strong emotion right now that the only words that fit that are very rude".

I also think that as our society moves away from more structured and rigid social roles, swearing is getting more acceptable since we in general are more tolerant of deviations from the norm.

Edit: I've obviously only scratched the surface, since this is a broad and complex topic.