this post was submitted on 13 Jul 2024
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Fuckin A man. I entered middle class briefly, for the first time in my life, by landing a coding job at six figures.
I let myself get warped, ethically, by my desire not slip below that line again, back into struggle.
But, fortunately for me, stepping away from the right path sapped my energy and I failed at the job and got fired. During the time I had that job my health suffered.
Now I realized that, at least for me, the only way I can rise sustainably is if I stay in accordance with my conscience. And the way it hurt my health, it made me realize it’s actually the right move to sacrifice the money to the conscience. The good feeling is better than anything money can buy.
I know it sounds cheesy, but it’s real for me. And honestly I feel fortunate to be weak enough that I can’t really operate in the world without that extra dopamine kick from my conscience. Like my discipline and focus aren’t great, and things fall apart when I start breaking promises and making bad ones and doing sloppy work for bad reasons, etc.