this post was submitted on 23 Apr 2024
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This has been a recurring one, but it's slowly changed as time has passed.
I'm on an endless stretch of road, sometimes walking, sometimes driving. On either side is just an endless ocean of grass. Sometimes I can catch sight of what looks like an old campfire out of the corner of my eye, but I can never look back far enough to really see.
For a long time, it was always this drive to keep moving. Never stop. Something is behind me, and I need distance. Nothing else matters. I couldn't even look back if I tried.
Over the last year, that feeling of being chased has went away. I don't wake up panicking. Now, there's a feeling of destination, and that I'm getting... Somewhere. I genuinely don't know. But it feels closer. And now, when I try, I can look behind myself somewhat. Not fully, but enough to see that there's at least more road immediately behind me.
It's become kinda hopeful. Not trying to read any grand importance into it, don't think it's prophetic, but it started to shift as I started taking better care of myself. Makes me kinda wonder if it isn't some fucked up part of my brain going "Hey, we're getting better".
That's a very nice progression! I think it's hard to say with dreams. Sometimes I wake up and was very obviously dreaming about something that was getting to me in real life, or something good that I aspire for in real life, and I can very easily see the path my brain took to want to show me that.
Then sometimes it shows me some insane bullshit that makes no surface sense at all, so it's hard to say. I think you could relatively safely read something into that, especially if it's ringing true for how you feel.