this post was submitted on 11 Feb 2024
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How do you date? (beehaw.org)
submitted 9 months ago by Gaywallet@beehaw.org to c/chat@beehaw.org
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Recently had a conversation with a good friend about dating, and it had me curious about how everyone on Beehaw approaches dating. Tell me a bit about how you date! Here's a few prompts/thoughts I'm curious about:

  • How long does it take for you to know if you're attracted to someone (sexually, romantically, emotionally, shared interests, etc)?
  • What do you like to do when you date and does it change depending on how many dates you've been on or how well you know the person?
  • Once you start dating someone, how long does it take you to understand whether you want to date the person long term or whether it's not going to work out?
  • Do you only date people you meet in real life or do you use dating apps? How do you approach going from stranger to dating them?
  • What's most important in deciding whether you want to date someone? Do they need to have an interest in activities you enjoy, shared values, emotional intelligence, a certain kind of humor, or something else?
  • Is there something you don't understand about dating and want to share your frustration?
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[–] autumn@beehaw.org 2 points 9 months ago

it’s been a minute since i’ve dated around, since i’ve been with my current partner for nearly eight years. but i love dating, even awkward first dates.

  • i’d say i tend to know pretty quickly, like a date or two in. sometimes the first date if we really hit it off.
  • i like getting a drink or two for the first date. low stakes, and i can make the excuse that i need to let my dogs out if i need to ditch it quickly. later, i like activity dates like swimming in the lake, a bike ride, hike, or rock climbing back when i used to do that. once we’re established as a couple, i love movie dates!
  • tends to be a couple of months. once i see how our schedules mesh, if they’re willing to compromise with me on certain things, meet some of their friends, etc.
  • i’ve always used dating apps. child of the internet and all.
  • shared values for sure. physical and sexual attraction are top tier as well. i used to think money didn’t matter, but after dating somebody with a very different income, it was tough for things not to feel imbalanced.

my partner and i still go on dates once a week. :)