this post was submitted on 12 Jan 2024
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Thanks, I love and appreciate you homie.
So ADHDers have a problem with object permanence. If we don't see it then it doesn't exist. This happens with people pretty regularly, unfortunately, where if we don't see the person or see something that reminds us of them we can sort of "forget they exist". It's never in an offensive way, our brain just doesn't work. Same with objects.
A good example is that during the Christmas period I made myself a meal. During that meal I had to use the stovetop for a variety of different things. I started to run out of space so I took a hot pot and put it in the oven, saying that I'd clean it with everything else.
That pot was sitting there from like the 28th until yesterday when the oven was turned on. I just forgot it existed. That also applies with things we own. Like I've bought snacks and put them in cupboards and then a day later think I have no snacks and get annoyed. Couple days later I open cupboard, suddenly remember, and hate myself. If I buy stuff I think is neat? Into a random box it goes to never be thought about again until I randomly open the box for something. So I take it out and put it down with other stuff to use. But it goes into a drawer and is immediately forgotten.
Or theres the flipside where instead of forgetting the item you just forget where you put it. Instead of putting it where it should belong, the ADHD brain goes "I must do this in the most convenient way possible to move on to more fun things". So you put it down just wherever is available and forget that information because it's boring and stupid. Then 15 minutes later you're having a panic attack trying to figure out what the fuck you did with it.
Thanks
I almost have the opposite of this, I'll have an image of where everything goes in my head, and if it's not there I'm like that T Rex in Jurassic park staring right at it but not seeing it.
I can definitely see the frustration and difficulty that would cause for you.
it can be both for us. We can remember where various trinkets are that we placed somewhere months ago if we want, to but the thing is we won't remember to want to remember that.
Example: my spare lens cap for my camera is currently in my cupboard in a bag full of rechargable batteries and some spare USB C cables.
Example 2: My journal in which I'm supposed to write in daily has become a part of the table and therefore I don't acknowledge it being there at all. I can walk past it and look at it but not see it multiple times a day.
Example 3: I need reminders on my phone to call my parents from time to time because if they're not in my immediate environment they sort, don't exist in my mind.
My mind works purely on "if I can't see it, it doesn't exist, until I'm reminded of it by something else" with an additional qurik that seeing isn't just looking, because things can simply become a part of the enviorment.
This last summer I decided to fire up the grill, and when I opened the lid I discovered my missing baking sheet covered in aluminum foil. It had been there for weeks.