this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2023
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You won't get justice or change anything about how the guy acts so you have to make changes yourself that you can control. Let yourself be free of needing his approval and attention. You deserve respect at least as much as you'd expect from any other person, being family doesn't absolve them of it. If he won't be respectful, then stop calling him, let his calls go to voice mail, stop seeing him and fill your time with people who are respectful. You can't change him but you don't have to put up with it either.
I agree with this post. Move on and build your life your way.
I'd like to add, in case it's helpful, from my own experience the thinking about it never ends. My dad passed 40 years ago and i still have the same thoughts, feelings, arguments even (a little more one-sided now that he's gone, though). I mean the dynamic might last forever, but you can separate that emotional internal dynamic from how you live your life. And there's a kind of "this stops here" effect, because your own children will never have to deal with all that stuff, because you dealt with it and moved on. That's something to be proud of.