killed him to further the prophecy that this is the end times.
this post was submitted on 21 Apr 2025
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Well the Pope ghosted JD, so JD obviously ghosted the Pope.
Being anywhere in Trump's orbit speeds up your trajectory towards death like Matt Damon in Saving Private Ryan. Donald Trump is, essentially, a biological version of "The Machine" from The Princess Bride pushed to 50.
Since the pope was only secondarily contaminated, the process was slower, but he was already so close to death as it is.
He spoke Spanish
If you're in the vatican, what else is there to do?
So a conclave power struggle is set off behind the scenes to try to install Cardinal Burke so that they have one less institution to get in the way
Because he didn't say "thank you" clearly
I don't know, but he better have said thanks
Couldn't hear the safe word through the ball gag.
Truth is, he wasn't trying to. Vance wanted to show off his zombie Jesus costume, but it turned out to be a killer costume!
(I just wanted to throw something in that isn't the same jokes everyone else is making)
Everyone here seems to be in on something that I've missed.
Edit: I read a reuters article, I see he met with JD yesterday.
It's all that white on white, he kinda looked like a couch. He wasn't trying to kill him, but the old man was frail and looked too much like a cushion.
good god no
Clearly he visited India today to discuss a Hindu Nationalist takeover of America
What's a Nazi's favorite color smoke?
White smoke.
(For all y'all non Catholics, the vatican has white smoke to signal when they elect a new pope...and ya know...JD Vance is a nazi.)
he threatened to release the video of him and cardinal wuerl spit roasting a luxury couch.
JD Vance had FOXDIE
The pope wouldn't let him ogle the holy see.
The pope's death was God's plan. God is the murderer. (Again)
Butthurt, his hallmark.