this post was submitted on 01 Mar 2025
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No Stupid Questions

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Disclaimer: This is not meant to be a bait or any kind of bad-faith devaluing or stereotyping. This is only based on my experience, hearing similar stories from others and wanting to understand. I'm aware that there are good and bad people everywhere.

So I'm European and starting on a good note I always admired America for many things like the freedom, diversity and cool movies.

But after more experience with meeting real Americans I noticed this personality type that I and I think many other non-Americans would describe as arrogant.

Like I stated before I'm not saying every American is like that and I know there are many very nice Americans. But I often saw that some Americans seem to only be nice on the surface (if at all) but actually seem to have this attitude of "I don't give a f about you". And I know that America is a very individualistic culture that focuses on the self and the belief that everyone can achieve anything on their own.

But I still think having a sense of empathy and sensitivity towards others is a very important core human quality that everyone should have. And from personal experience and also from a very prevalent notion of others both in every day life and when looking it up online it's clear that many non-Americans perceive many Americans to cross a line there.

For example there's a prevalent observation of Americans visiting other countries and acting like they own the place by being very loud, demanding and not accepting if things aren't the same way as they are in America.

We know that Americans have very big issues with divisiveness and social injustice and it seams like there's also this sort of "ghetto" personality including trash-talking, lots of vulgar slang and slurs and bragging.

And a general perception of money playing a big role as if many Americans judge someone's worth by money and this attitude of not feeling like needing to help someone. I think there's this famous description of a person lying in the middle of the ground in a public city and people just walk around the person not feeling the need to help.

It almost feels like they're very entitled and put their ego up way higher than it actually is and lacking the quality of making themselves smaller/putting themselves second to treat others with more dignity.

(page 2) 46 comments
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[–] bstix@feddit.dk 2 points 2 days ago

I think a lot of their culture revolves around adolescence. Sports, music, movies, fashion etc. are based on juvenile traits, where talking, actions and getting attention are more important than more mature things like listening and compromising.

They're not all like that, but there certainly are many who get through life in an American cultural bubble. When you reach your early twenties you probably think you've got everything figured out. That will last until you encounter other cultures that can challenge your views. A lot of Americans don't encounter other cultures.

I know plenty of Europeans who are similar, but they don't appear as one group. A German ignorant appears and speaks different than a Swedish ignorant, and both countries are known for having a similar superiority complex based on their own domestic successes. The Americans are in a disadvantage here, since everyone can hear and understand them, and there's quite a lot of them, so their presence is just a lot more obvious.

[–] NeoNachtwaechter@lemmy.world 11 points 3 days ago

I have observed a huuuge difference in this regard between the Usamericans that I have met in real life (when they have moved to Europe) and the ones that I have met online because they still live there.

So, one part of the arrogance comes when they have never seen the world, but talk about it as if they knew it.

[–] Hotspur@lemmy.ml 14 points 4 days ago

American culture, partly because of bullshit mythos and partly because of religious like devotion to oligarchic capitalism, selects for low-empathy sociopaths and individual atomization/isolation. My favorite low end example is to observe my fellow citizens driving when I go to the suburbs: you are in their personal story, and you are in their way. City living doesn’t fix all that, but having to live in close proximity to neighbors and get used to compromise helps push a slightly more communal vibe.

But basically the entire culture is built around a get-yours-first mentality? And more recently an influencer-inflected sort of hyper-real understanding of one’s value and potential. We’re like a national exemplar for the dunning-Kruger effect, or like kids who cheat at online video games swaggering around proud of their “achievements”.

Seems like we’re in the finding out phase after fucking around though.

[–] cabbage@piefed.social 9 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

There are good replies here already, but I just want to emphasize the role of bragging. It seems boasting about yourself is quite accepted and sometimes perhaps even expected in the US. In Europe it is not at all, and we tend to react strongly to it.

Whenever I've found Americans to be insufferable they've always been bragging or taking themselves too seriously.

Not all Americans obviously. And I guess a lot of Americans can't stand these people either. But it's still a common American trait that very few Europeans will have patience for. Even our narcissists have learned to pretend to be humble.

[–] XiELEd@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Yeah, my mom and I (in the Philippines) saw an American talk about having lots of money quite loudly in a shopping mall. We were put off.

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[–] neidu3@sh.itjust.works 10 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (2 children)

I wouldn't say arrogant, but I've worked with a lot of Americans, and there's something most of them have in common. I can't quite put my finger on what, but it's in the vicinity or arrogance. I simply don't have the necessary English vocabulary to explain it properly.

In short, I've found that most of them likes to swing their dick around and pull rank, even if someone else clearly has a better approach/solution/suggestion. This is far from unique to americans, but it seems more prevalent compared to the other nationalities I've worked with.

[–] TheFeatureCreature@lemmy.ca 14 points 4 days ago (1 children)

They have a tendency to be cocky, headstrong, and ignorant of the greater world and people around them.

I have lost count of the amount of Americans I have met and spoken to that think them and their country are the centre of the universe. And I don't mean that in a mocking or mean way - many of them were amazingly nice people but they legitimately did not know any better.

[–] dcpDarkMatter@kbin.earth 6 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I think a lot of ignorance of other countries and people are tied into how big the US is. it's basically as if all of Europe was one country, had a shared, baseline culture, and everyone spoke the same language.

Over in Europe, you can travel through multiple countries, each with their own shared history, language, and culture, each distinct from another - all in the same day.

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 4 days ago

More perspective on how big it is: You can drive 12 hours and not make it out of California. And our rail system is pitiful, meaning many people don’t travel anywhere they can’t easily drive or affordably fly.

[–] Kaboom@reddthat.com 1 points 4 days ago (2 children)
[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 1 points 2 days ago

"The more I learn, the more I realize how little I know."

[–] neidu3@sh.itjust.works 3 points 4 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Maybe, but not necessarily in a good way. Unfounded, to the point of cocky, I think.

More than once have I had to say something along the lines of "Yeah, we know, you're not the first to suggest this. There's a reason why we don't do that."

...and, again, not exclusive to Americans. But definitely more common.

[–] Nemo@slrpnk.net 9 points 4 days ago

It seems that way because we are, on the whole, actually arrogant.

[–] sunzu2@thebrainbin.org 8 points 4 days ago

Americans seem to only be nice on the surface (if at all) but actually seem to have this attitude of "I don't give a f about you"

Nailed lol... an American wants people to like him while he screws you over.

Example archetypes: CEO, Billionaire, Manager,

For example there's a prevalent observation of Americans visiting other countries and acting like they own the place by being very loud, demanding and not accepting if things aren't the same way as they are in America.

That's just poorly socialized people though. We hear of other countries tourist behaving poorly all the time... Russia and China for example.

"ghetto" personality including trash-talking, lots of vulgar slang and slurs and bragging.

I guessing you never met a British lad after a few pints haha

And a general perception of money playing a big role as if many Americans judge someone's worth by money and this attitude of not feeling like needing to help someone

I am pretty every one is like this, it is human nature, some people are better at controlling it OR

masking it which ties into the first quote of this post.

Overall i think you called it right at first but examples you are providing is just shiti behavior people over all but it does support the original premises that Americans want to be liked while fucking you over.

I think it comes from the propaganda we consume that essentially say:

If you fuck people over to get paid, you are still a good person and other people must respect your "achievement"

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 8 points 4 days ago (1 children)

"I learned it from you, Dad! I learned it from you!" - America to England

[–] sunzu2@thebrainbin.org 4 points 4 days ago

UK does have a special hate for the poors and yes US models it on it and adds but UK version is the OG disdain for the less fortunate

[–] magnetosphere@fedia.io 5 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I think a lot of it comes from being the military and economic superpower of the world. We Americans must be an exceptional people, since we are so powerful in so many ways! (Please, feel free to add as much sarcasm as you feel is necessary to the previous statement, but remember that a lot of people say that with almost religious seriousness.)

Not enough people take geography into account, either. It has had a major effect on American society and our attitude towards other countries. We Americans have rarely needed to share. Our country is almost as big as, and quite isolated from, all of Europe. Our neighbor to the north largely speaks English, and is culturally quite similar to us. Our neighbor to the south has a culture worthy of admiration, but they are not seriously respected by most Americans.

That’s it. Two neighbors sharing borders with mainland USA. On the east and west, we have huge coastlines on two of the world’s largest oceans.

The most serious military threats to America were caused by countries an ocean away, and they were ultimately unsuccessful. Don’t forget our civil war… but even through all that, the government survived (and I’m glad it did, because we were basically fighting against people who wanted to uphold the right to keep slaves. Sure, you can argue that I’m oversimplifying things, but I’m not wrong). Add to that the concept of Manifest Destiny. People sincerely believed that it was GODS WILL that we conquer the land all the way to the Pacific, natives be damned.

Americans have believed in American Exceptionalism for about as long as America has existed. I can’t blame people for having a view that was drilled into their subconscious, but I can (and do) blame us when we’re insensitive dicks about it.

That whole geography thing only works if we remain united. That's no longer a given in my book.

[–] ElcaineVolta@kbin.melroy.org 5 points 4 days ago

the american populace at large is deeply arrogant; not only that but also incredibly ignorant. it's this noxious blend that is not only really popular to personify, but often lauded for doing so as loudly as possible.

[–] sharkfucker420@lemmy.ml 4 points 4 days ago

Rugged individualism and American exceptionalism are the likely culprits

[–] jeffw@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago (3 children)

Why does it seem like so many non-Americans stereotype Americans?

[–] LesbiansMadeMeGay@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (2 children)

You assume that just because you and your country is so ignorant to the rest of the world that we too are ignorant to you.

We experience your country and its citizens everywhere, all the time, constantly. You come to our cities without even learning how to pronounce their name. You get confused when we don't know your local terms for food, drinks, podunk towns, etc. Your discourse consumes the internet, colonialistically driving all analysis through a purely "American" lens. At this point you're so used to this digital status quo that I am regularly assumed to be American by default, even on local discussion boards. My news feed is filled with articles about your despotic leader and increasingly radicalized population, as they speculate whether this spur of the moment decision will crash our economy or totally collapse the world order. And then I'm told by you (not literally you) that "this is not who we are", despite the fact that a majority of your voting population asked for this. Asked for persecution of your most vulnerable populations and cheered on as it was enacted.

I understand that the negative associations do not apply to all Americans. For one, obviously near half of the voting population did not vote for your current largest liability and are also horrified by his actions. My point is that you're failing to recognise how omnipresent your culture and politics have been on the global stage for decades, along with your literal presence in our conversations. A lot of these "stereotypes" are formed from personal experience.

My point is that you're failing to recognise how omnipresent your culture and politics have been on the global stage for decades, along with your literal presence in our conversations.

Well said.

[–] folkrav@lemmy.ca 3 points 3 days ago

You managed to describe a feeling I’ve had for a while but never managed to articulate correctly. Thanks.

[–] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Ah, there's that arrogance.

[–] jeffw@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I'm an American citizen, buddy.

[–] jeffw@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Okay buddy. Stockholm syndrome isn’t a bragging point

[–] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (6 children)

That's not how Stockholm Syndrome (not real) is supposed to work (it would mean I held my fellow Americans in high esteem, not the opposite) but whatever... It doesn't mean I can't recognize the arrogance of my fellow Americans, including one who literally had the situation explained to him very clearly but is still too obtuse to understand as if that doesn't prove his arrogance. But you do you, man. Have fun being the Ugly American.

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[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 0 points 2 days ago

Self reflection doesn't hurt that much. I've been doing a lot of it lately. I see it as a sort of ... Not inoculation, kind of a penicillin shot for the current Ill of thought, word, deed. We're human, sometimes better, often worse, never a train not to seek to be better, but even then, we're human. Some days are better than others.

[–] slackassassin@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 days ago

Because everyone hates xenophobia until it makes them feel superior.

[–] El_guapazo@lemmy.world 0 points 4 days ago (1 children)

It makes sense if you accept that fascism was exported by the US. That and the national imperialist attitude is what you're noticing.

Sweet username, fellow Three Amigos fan.

[–] foggy@lemmy.world -5 points 4 days ago

This is itself arrogant.

Are you American? If no... Ever heard of stereotypes?

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