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The original was posted on /r/hfy by /u/KyleKKent on 2024-11-30 00:29:37+00:00.
(Tooth pain and appointment on Monday. Oh this weekend is gonna be greaaat.)
The Buzz on the Spin
“So are they, or are they not dangerous?”
“They’re shy if nothing else, but I have no proof they’ve done anything more than watch. They might be dangerous, but it’s the same kind of dangerous that any random person could suddenly turn around with a knife and get to stabbing.”
“Hmm... not good. Not too bad, but not good either.” She notes. “Granted, there’s only a small, artificial ocean between us and a massive sector filled with living murder machines and in the other directions is an unstoppable hunter.”
“In that light it does seem like a small concern.” Observer Wu comments, but the look he gives Harold tells him to stay on guard anyways. He gets a nod in return for that. “Now, could you point us to someone that could well and truly introduce us to The Gravid Faith, or at least this branch of it?”
“She’s refereeing the play duels for the children, our branch ties into Saint Twinblade and those like her, so we’re a fair bit more martial than most.”
“And you other Saints like her?”
“Plenty, and some more festival prone branches of our branch can have a party every day and still be missing out on some saints.”
“You have branches of the branch?”
“The Church of the Guardian Mother is an old and respected part of the Gravid Faith. Our branch has been around longer than many, many other religions so of course it has it’s own branches. A few of THEM have their own branches too! Hell, there’s even a branch of our branch that has union with The Synthetic Ascension.” The Greeter says before shaking her head. “Okay, you know what? Go back there and talk to the Snict with Cybrog blades that have guns attached. She’s our Head Priestess.”
“Oh I bet she has a STORY about how she came about those.”
“She does. Now, in you get. We have another group coming.” She says nodding beyond them as what looks like a small army of civilians is on the approach.
“Probably wise, thank you for your time ma’am.” Observer Wu says they all head in.
“Alright, I just called the boss and he kicked the problem to someone on proper duty. Paternity leave is considered downright sacred here so the only way he’s on the job during the next three days is if there’s an asteroid, energy bombardment or some other kind of munition hitting the station.” Patras says after getting off his communicator.
“So do comets not count?” Harold asks.
“Those things are so shiny and so easily dealt with that if you’re hit by one you deserve it. We’re close enough to the nearest start that comets start getting really bright days before one can get close enough to hit us.”
“Even with the variances of speed?”
“Even then. Space isn’t a true vacuum, there are still particles out there, just really spread out. At certain speeds though hitting even those minute particles can really slow you down. So there’s an upward limit for unpowered motion in space.”
“Makes sense I suppose... There’s also the fact that a non-broadcasting object moving faster than light would hit before anyone could see it and then we’d be done.”
“True! There are stories man! Stories of stations just...” He snaps his fingers. “Gone! Like that! Maybe that’s where the FTL asteroids are?”
“Yes, and no one ever survives or can give proper coordinates or even a general overview of the imports and exports of the station. Just, this big mining station or observer outpost or military base was suddenly shattered and blah blah blah. I’ve heard them myself. You may as well start the story with ‘It was a dark and stormy night!’.” Harold teases.
“There is no night in space, nor is there day! Just the unending twilight and battering of unfeeling stars!”
“Write a horror novel, I hear Lovecraft’s a good pen name for that genre.”
“I actually did read some of that, it was hilarious. Was he seriously scared of an air-conditioner?”
“The man was basically Omni-Phobic, pathologically and irrationally afraid of everything. Couple that with a pretty miserable life and no doubt an entire battery of undiagnosed ISSUES and you get an impassioned but insane horror novelist.” Harold says.
“Hunh, someone looked into it.”
“Enforced downtime to not overdo things and an overactive mind bordering on ADHD means I read a lot. And sometimes the authors are more interesting than what they’ve written. Personally, Lovecraft doesn’t do it for me. He invites the reader to fill in the blanks so often that it kills it for me. If I can imagine something, I can imagine myself fighting it. If I can fight it I can beat it and if I can beat it, then why be afraid of it?”
“That’s hilarious.”
“I mean, big ephemeral thing that can be splattered by a boat but reforms? I can take that. Huge invisi-whats-it that can detonate houses? Easy. A big flipping mess on the floor that was a reanimated body? Boring.” Harold says and Patras starts chuckling.
“Horror doesn’t always translate.” He says evenly as there’s a sudden cheer nearby as someone is clearly winning one of the little duels going on and around.
“And we have a winner! Little Galaici has shown her mastery of duel sword fighting to disarm Sarissi!” A cheerful voice announces and there’s a little laser show. “Come on over for your prize little lady, you’ve earned it!”
Around a cluster of stalls and games there’s a large seating area and numerous little duelling arenas where little girls are swinging around foam swords with reckless abandon. The supervising adults are going around helping them take the right stance, stopping them from throwing the weapons of putting the foam sheathes back onto the sticks so they don’t decide to win by whacking their opponent with something resembling a real weapon.
And there is the woman indicated, a Snict who looks... freshly rejuvenated and clearly ready for fun. Because she is bouncy, happy and looks like she hasn’t been in a fight her entire life. There’s also something about her that has Observer Wu pause, blink and pinch the bridge of his nose. Then refuse to elaborate as to why he did that.
But the fact that her cybernetic blades are in fact chainsaws, and chainsaw bayonets with what look like modified cannons on the end of her other limbs makes the image really, really interesting.
“You know, she might be an interesting sort.” Giria says as she sizes the Snict up and down and notices her stance, while at ease, is ready to shift into a more stable posture.
“It’s confusing with the real deal disguise themselves as posers.” Javra says fluttering overhead.
“Uh, yeah of course I’m the real deal. Duh?” The Head Priestess asks glancing over to them then gesturing them over with a motion from one of the incredibly deadly but also impractical and intimidating weapons embedded on her blade limbs.
She’s completely baby-faced and looks like an over-developed teen rather than a fully grown woman. “Now, how can I help you?”
“Greetings madam, I am Observer Wu, from Earth. I’m bringing back a study and understanding of the Galaxy at large back to the homeworld. I understand that you’re the go-to woman for this branch of The Gravid Faith here on the station correct?”
“Really? And here I thought that awful first impression turned you humans away from us.”
“We’re cautious.” Observer Wu says.
“Alright well... Hey! Keep that foam on the stick or you lose automatically little lady. Don’t think I can’t see what you’re trying to do!” She begins to answer before being distracted.
“How about at the beginning. What’s the main thing that The Gravid Faith agrees on, and what extra makes your branch stand out?”
“The Church of the Guardian Mother. Hmm... well to start with the Gravid Faith, you need to at least hear The Gravid Truth. Which is a simple, observable truth that our entire faith is built upon. The Truth is that there must be another generation, it must be cared for and taught and cherished. Fail in these things and your society dies, your history ends and everything crashes. These are inalienable truths that do not care if you are some form of plant, creature or person. You MUST have children and there MUST be another generation, or all will fade.”
“Sensible.”
“Good, now the different branches and considerations all boil down to the how. How do we go about securing our future? Do we lock down the men, milk them of all they have and ensure that through sheer numbers that each bloodline produces armies at every branch?”
Observer Wu says nothing.
“Some do in fact believe that. They’re considered fairly radical by most, but it’s one of the earliest deviations and some would even argue the original interpretation of the Gravid Truth.” She says before nodding. “The Church of the Guardian Mother focuses mostly on two main ideas. Orphans and preventing them.”
“Preventing them?”
“If the family is strong enough and well off enough to avoid being killed is the general idea.” She says. “As for dealing with orphans, you un-orphan them.”
“I’m positive that’s not the actual written creed.” Observer Wu says.
“How would you know? Have you read it?” She challenges.
“If I do then you’ll celebrate a victory, if I don’t then I have to take your word for it.” He says and she gives him a beaming smile in response. “Well played.”
“Thank you.” She says before suddenly cheering. “And Ninnas has disarmed her opponent! Sorry Galaluna! Better luck next time! Come on over for your prize little...
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