A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~
me dying and my pets experiencing a slow and excruciating death by dehydration and starvation; meowing and barking the entire time for help while everyone ignores the nuisance until it finally stops for good.
i never setup automatic rent payments in the hopes that the eviction process will happen soon enough so at least it get someone's attention before they pass so terribly.
You know some people may call you crazy for that but in the grand scheme of things that is pretty smart what you do with the payments, and if that’s the thing that scares you and thats your way to get a piece of mind then good on you.
i hear odd more often than crazy because my neurodivergence makes human relationships difficult but people will engage since i'm on the part of the spectrum that makes me seem outwardly "normal"; so my pets are my entire social circle and the most important thing in my life. it doesn't matter to me if people think me crazy for it because i know i literally will go crazy without my pets.
i'm also pretty sure that relying on this almost dystopian rental market to continue dystopifying is not a good idea given multitudes of caveats in each jurisdiction; but i'm equally sure that owning a home would guarantee the death sentence i described for my pets.
Not odd or crazy, but that being said do you have anyone you could contact regularly? If something bad was to happen and you didn’t contact them then that could trigger them to come round to check on you.
I personally hate these fucking data collecting things, but have you thought about getting a smartwatch? It think it can inform medical services if something happens to you and if you have configured it that way.
i hate them too, but i hadn't considered this and it's brilliant; thank you!
i'm not a fan of the data collection either; but the bigger reason why i haven't gotten one is because i'm a klutz that has accidentally destroyed every single dumb watch i've ever had while wearing it.
i know that they make rugged smartphones and i wonder now if they make rugged smart watches. i'm equally a klutz with smartphones, so i've had rugged phones before and I learned that they're usually a few generations behind their ordinary counterparts in terms of features/capabilities so i'll need to find one that's up to date enough and reliable enough (all of the rugged phones had quirks/shortcomings) to inform medical services.
i don't know where to start; but this is my new priority project.
Good question, unfortunately I’m not an expert and don’t use one.
But if you like a recommendation for a regular rugged watch: Try a G-Shock. Or try a dive watch from a reputable brand, they are built like tanks most of the time.
thank you!
That I will scream in my sleep and have nobody to wake me up, and it’ll be embarrassing at minimum and maybe get the cops called at worst.
The screaming part isn’t hypothetical, it happens pretty regularly.
Bad nightmares Or is that just something that happens?
I assume it must be nightmares, but I usually don’t remember them when I’m woken up. I think it’s PTSD related, but who knows.
Hey, so, not a licensed professional, but deal with something just like that(screaming in sleep).
Go talk to a professional. Mine was PTSD-related night terrors, and once I got on Miratazapine with therapy, they actually went away. Been something I've dealt with since my early teens, and I've not had an episode in months.
Thanks for the medication info! I’ve been in therapy and currently have a psychiatrist but haven’t focused much on the screaming issue. I’ll bring it up in my next appointment to see if it would work well with my meds.
Yeah I suppose nightmares can be like dreams once you wake up and eventually set your mind on something else you may forget what happened unless it was something that stuck with you.
And as far as PTSD if that’s something you have then that must be the cause for nightmares thus making you scream with out knowing.
I started screaming during my sleep after my mom died. It was a complicated relationship. As the years go by it happens less and less. Scared the shit out of my wife many times. I think I will remember one of the nightmares for the rest of my life. I usually enjoy scary dreams.
My wife has woken me up several times because I was saying "no no no no no no" in my sleep. It's not loud enough to disturb anyone not in the room and I live in a pretty rural area anyway, so I've wondered in the past whether I did that with any regularity before I shared a bed with anyone.
Humans. The only thing I'm scared of in this life are other humans.
Medical emergency
I once had a medical emergency when home alone, I was making a sandwich and was cutting ham when the knife slipped and nearly cut the end of my finger off. Luckily I had my phone and was able to call for some help.
Best thing to do imo is have your phone nearby you when home alone.
I know people here hate them but Google home/Alexa have emergency capabilities now too I believe. My mil was telling me about it
Someone I knew fell down the stairs while home alone and couldn't get up. He was able to call out towards the kitchen and tell Alexa to call for help. If he wasn't able to do that, he would have been lying there much longer before anyone could find out. It sucks for privacy, but those types of devices do have some legitimate helpful uses.
The Wet Bandits
Well, I was afraid that I could do nothing to quell a home invasion, which not only was my area having an uptick in but my best friend's house (and the friend) fell victim to, pistol whipped him and everything we had to glue his scalp back together.
Then I bought a gun. I already knew how to use them because "Uncle," so I didn't have to learn how, which was a plus, just had to learn the laws and practice technique. Now I'm not so scared of home invasions, I can defend myself against them, and I've since moved out of the hood which was another huge bonus, but they still happen here too.
Luckily so far the only time I ever did have to use it I was in a walmart parking lot, not home, and the guy with a knife pointed at us turned and left when he saw me grab it, not a shot fired thank "Bob."
Hey at least you only had to use it once, hopefully that’s the last time you have to use it.
And I suppose that’s the best defence in the event of a home invasion taking place.
Also sorry to hear about what happened to your friend.
I sure as hell hope so! I never want to have to harm anyone, but I also don't want anyone to harm me or my loved ones lol.
Unfortunately it is, the cops are slow around here, they can only show up after the event (unless they're the ones doing the crime lol), and the criminals (violent ones, not like retail theft, ykwim) also have their own weapons be they guns, knives, crowbars, etc.
Thanks, though he's fine now! This was a while ago, he's also moved and armed now too, and his head healed (but it kinda healed around the glue lol, so that was a problem for a while.) He's doing good these days!
Nice glad your friend is doing better now, and tbf if the police are slow then that’s definitely an issue, no one should be forced to protect themself due to slow response times
Eh I can't blame them too much, they can only come when you call them, and when you need to defend yourself sometimes you don't have time to call until after the attack. There's certainly room for improvement though!
Not that I’m actually scared to be alone, but my biggest concern is home invasion.
Where the hell do you live? I live in a pretty large city, Manchester, and I’ve never been concerned with random attacks of violence.
I guess I used the wrong term. Not "concern", rather "fear". The risk is relatively low in my neighborhood, it's just a fear I have as someone living in a SFH for the first time. I've lived in dense housing most of my life and I felt more "safe" being in close vicinity to other people.
I can't believe no one said the things under the bed, or the things looking in through the window. On the rare occasion that I'm home alone I still jump several feet to get into bed. Yes I'm too old for this but it's the truth.
Real answer, in college the apartment I was living in was broken into by a neighbor and attacked my roommate. When I heard noise coming from his room I went to go check on him and the attacker turned on me and started to attack me. My injuries were far less severe from my roommate’s. Ever since then I can’t fall asleep unless I check all the doors to make sure they are locked even if I know it’s locked I’ll double check it before laying down for the night. At times when I’m alone in the house I can still get to sleep but it’s a restless sleep because of how uneasy I feel about being alone in a house at night. That shit sucks to never feel fully safe in your own home.
Ahhh shoot, I’m sorry you had to deal with that, you know maybe leaving a light on at night or buying something like a doorbell cam. Might help.
I do have those things and wish I could tell you that they do help. Fact is the feeling really doesn’t help or go away. The only thing that helps is not being home alone at night.
Yeah I get you, I suppose that every little thing helps to at least improve the situation.
I think the main thing is that when we are home alone I suppose our alertness is higher which might make us paranoid.
Nothing. I like to be home alone.
But of course I like it even better if my partner is here with me.
I’m afraid that someone will break into my house. It’s a completely irrational fear but that knowledge has never helped me. I panic from each weird sound I hear when I’m alone while if someone else is in the house I don’t worry and just assume the sound comes from them. I barely have any expensive items so I’m mostly just scared of the possibility of a physical confrontation. I think I developed this fear from watching too many detective shows as a child.
All the biking I’m not doing. If no one is home, my obligations are fewer so I should go for a bike ride.