Asklemmy

Super powerful space ninjas with mommy issues shoot big ass guns.

Navy SEAL tries to convince the government that mechacuttlefish aren't a conspiracy theory.

Virgin seeking love.

Enjoys long walks on beaches, lakes, rot etc. Travelling is my passion!

Environmentally conscious. Believes in, loves and supports global warming. Burn those trees down!

Dislikes: lobster.

Interested? Write me back soon! I love a good old finger written note. I'm old fashioned like that x

Normal mailman gets shot and robbed, embarks on quest for revenge, acidentaly changes politics of the area forever.

Eh kills aleins and doesnt afraid of anything

One armed topless homosexual tricks gullible mass murderer with a shape changing laser sword into freeing him from super sleep meanwhile robin williams impersonator fools an entire religious group into believing he is not one of them somehow hiding his space wizard powers from all the other space wizards before basically killing them all.

Drunk man shouts at over grown lizards

A drunk politician ruins a random high school student's life.

A man's quest to murder their father turns the whole world upside down.

Arrive on shores of Foreign lands, Find piece of books, find closed doors, find crystals that go into a temple, oh,

Gigantic balls that you shove your nose into.

Also, people who purposefully pretend to drive poorly because their parents don't openly show them affection.

A group of teenagers who hate loud music die. Then they eat a bunch of food and meet/become god. Also maybe they become better people or something? IDK, I'm still trying to influence fashion to min/max my stats.

Your mom dies, your brother runs away so now your dad spends all his time looking for him, and your village gets overtaken by fascists, oh and you're like 12. Somehow it's your job to save the world though.

Rock and stone

A corporation send you to the most beatiful alien planet and you will put floating concrete platforms everywhere

tradie goes on murderous rampage, breaks into multiple historical buildings trying to find his girlfriend.

Run around an island with a bunch of talking, bipedal animals.

Not necessarily my favorite, but I couldn't think of something better:

A girl who orgasms at the thought of battling children, little miss crippling social anxiety, and mister daddy/mommy issues all need your help!

Not the 3rd or 4th time you were a prisoner, but the 2nd.

You touch something you shouldn't have, then nobody would ever believe what you've seen, but you keep trying to convince every species in the galaxy.

Geat beat up enough times and you'll become a pensioner

Spikey hair man, a stuffed animal friend, a meow meow best animal friend, a cigarette smoking space uncle, black gun arm man, big boobie bestie, christian pink girl, thieving ninja girl, and emo vampire-esque goth daddy re-enact Armageddon and also fight long white hair man with mommy issues. Also a dirty old man with floating crystals, no legs, and the ability to fly gives you advice.

You and a girl are having fun at the fair until a portal opens. You enter the portal for everyone to claim your girl is a queen.

You're an ex CEO of a Japanese company, but somehow are still pulled in their affair.

You're an outlaw who steals the pets of other people and must recruit them to stop a corrupt mayor and his army of evil Power Rangers from setting up animal abuse factories.

Big chickens, big cats, big squirrels, big whatever the fuck that thing is. Better kill or capture them using my big sword.