this post was submitted on 13 May 2025
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[โ€“] WoodScientist@sh.itjust.works 14 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

The genie begins to object. But before it can utter more than a few words, it screams in an echoing, otherworldly yell that rolls across the landscape. A bright flash of golden light emits from its eyes and hands. Then, like a snuffing of a candle, it ceases. The genie collapses on the floor, dead.

The three wishes rule isn't there to keep you from trying to be God. It's there simply as a cap to keep you from wishing for something so great that the genie dies trying to grant it. Genies are compulsively forced to fulfill all wishes made to them by their lamp holder. The same thing would happen if you wished for something ridiculously impactful that wouldn't violate even the spirit of the rules. Like if you wished to halve the speed of light. The genie can do quite a lot. The genie can literally make you an emperor over millions. But its powers are still of the scale of mortal men. Any wish that would alter the very foundations of reality? The genie attempts to alter the web of reality. But the required power is so great that the genie is completely burned out before it can fulfill even 0.0000000000000000001% of its assigned task. Instead, the genie burns its power out like a match thrown into the ocean. This scale of things is simply beyond it.

Anyway, congrats. You just forced an intelligent being, a poor soul already bound to endless servitude, to immolate itself in a futile attempt to ascend you to godhood.

There is now what appears to be a human corpse sitting in your living room. In fact, it looks like the corpse of a random Arabic guy, covered in blue body paint, dressed in a stereotypical slave costume. They are dead. And they are now your problem.

Good luck explaining that one to the cops. Also, the lamp is just a regular oil lamp now. You just have a random dead dude and an oil lamp. I hope the cops buy that you just accidentally killed a genie.

[โ€“] davidgro@lemmy.world 5 points 5 hours ago

So far the best counter I've seen. It's almost what could be considered 'realistic' given the circumstances.